I'll Burn This Whole World Down
by Darksouls18
Summary: Sequel to 'I Was Dead, Funny How Life Works, Isn't it' Bella wakes up six feet underground to learn she died four months ago. Her brother's still trying to destroy the planet, one town at a time. Dean's a wreck, Castiel's wingless, Sam's rocking the lost puppy look, Lucifer's running around like he owns the place and Mara has finally lost it. Oh yeah, it was good to be back.
1. Oh Yeah, It Was Good To Be Back

I felt my body jolt, and i gagged, coughing up dirt, and when only more filled my mouth i panicked. I squeezed my eyes closed, throwing my arm forward, again, only meeting more dirt. I struggled, struggled to breathe and my finger nails cut at wood as i pushed. i didn't want to die. I didn't want to die by stranglation, i wouldn't.

I pushed, harder and harder, and the more i pushed, the less i breathed. Then i just pushed with a huge breath, and as i exhaled dirt flew away from me and the sky smiled down on me, as if it'd been waiting for me. I turned over, gagging up dirt and pulled myself out of the mud, still gagging as more dirt fell from my lungs, to my tongue and back to the ground.

I fell onto my back, staring up at the bright blue sky, and just breathed. God, breath and light were wonderful things sometimes. i rolled onto my side, taking some calming breaths. As if she were in my mind i could still here her, "just breathe, your fine," she would say, over and over again, smiling at me as if i were an amusement park clown. But no, i didn't think amusement clowns were all that funny, at least since Sam told me about his run in with an evil clown. I remembered how much she'd laughed during that story. Sam and Dean just glared.

A shiver ran up my spine and i sat up, looking around curiously. I wasn't too sure where i was. I didn't recognize any of the area, at least none of the trees. I stood up, my legs felt like jello, but i pushed forward, and noticed i was just a short walk from a road. But what road? I wasn't too sure. I figured i should get to the road first.

I couldn't remember much, i realized once i'd begun walking on the road. Just a weird sort of pain in my side, but then like a wave of nothing but the feeling of sleep.

A car slowed down next to me and i stared at the cruiser in distaste. Recalling everything from L.A. "Are you okay, Miss? Do you need some help?" i glanced up the road and then nodded. Who knows how long i'd end up walking till i found a road.

She opened the door for me, and i listened to her prattle on about things that made no sense or meant next to nothing until we arrived at a police station. I had been dead for at least four months and if that wasn't bad enough, half the news i learned was. I was in Ilchester, Maryland. Vague remnants of what happened here made me wonder, where was everyone. Not a whole made sense once i saw the sign that said Maryland. When the hell did i get to Maryland?

The police officer led me into the sheriff's office, pointing me at a bunch of payphones. I searched myself, having no money, "can i borrow a few bucks, i promise as soon as someone picks me up, i can pay you back," i promised. I suddenly had a deja vu feeling, but decided to ignore it. I must've looked half nuts. Covered in dirt and looking pale as hell, i was surprised she even gave me a ride.

"No problem," he said smiling at me in a sort of hesitant way. I brushed it off, taking the change and moving towards the pay phones.

My sisters phone was either disconnected or she changed numbers, but so had Dean's and Sam's. I finally got through at Bobby's, who answered in a sort of swearing, "it's three in the morning, this outta be good!"

"Bobby? Come get me! It's Bella, why did you leave me out here?" i hissed into the phone, not realizing how angry i had been. I took a deep breath calming myself. i heard some shouted names in the background and frowned.

"Bella?" Dean's all too hopeful voice asked.

"Yes, it's Bella, did you think it was funny leaving, what the hell!" i said, still kind of outraged.

"Where are you? Are you hurt? Is Mara with you?" he asked the last part hesitantly and i tried not to glare into the screen.

"No, Mara's not with me! She wouldn't bury me alive, you dicks! I'm in Ilchester. i'm at the sheriff's office, now if someone doesn't come get me, i'm going to be severly pissed off," i growled out.

"Fine, what do you mean, Ilchester, like, four months ago, Ilchester, Maryland?" he asked hesitantly again.

"Yes, Maryland!" i practically shouted, the phone suddenly went soundless and i flinched when the entire phone had fallen in on itself. As if it'd been crushed by a giant hand. I dropped the handle, staring. Had i done that? Wings flapped behind me and i stared at Cas confused, who looked just as confused as i did. He grabbed my arm and then suddenly we switched locations.

Cas swayed, and Dean helped him lay down and before i could speak someone splashed water on me,

I flinched in surprise and glared at Sam furiously. "What the hell!"

"S-sorry," he said, moving backwards, "she's human."

"Yes, i'm human! Who did you think i was? Mary fucking poppins?" i shouted and the lights flickered. We all went silent and i froze. That was me. I kept doing that. I was acting angry, i was lashing out. "i'm acting like a demon," i turned to everyone else. "I'm acting like a demon! What's wrong with me!"

They all just stared at me frowning and that scared me even more. "I mean sure, i was a little pissed off with the cheating and i mean, i even drank a little, but i wasn't muderous!" i flinched at the word and then the lights flickered again. "Oh my god! I'm a demon! Whose body am in?" i shouted, stumbling towards the bathroom to check out a mirror.

I stood there, staring what was exactly me, just, covered in dirt and hysteria. I turned to Sam, who looked wary, "what's wrong with me?"

"What do you rememer Bella?" Dean asked, hesitantly. I noticed the cringe on his face as he spoke my name and frowned when he took a long hearty pull of gin.

"I don't know, Mara driving us across the country getting here, Sam was in the panic room," Sam flinched and i frowned, "i said some stuff to Mara, God, what i said to her," i said, guilt ebbing as i remembered her pained expression. i had no right to say those things. "Than just the oddest feeling, like being poked and someone telling me to sleep. Why? And why the hell did i wake up in a box?"

Everyone looked away and it finally clicked in. "Oh no, oh god, dont tell me," i breathed shakily, "i didn't-i couldn't have. I-." I couldn't finish the words.

"Yeah, you died, were pretty sure Lilith did it, but we dont know for sure if it was her or Kade who did it," Dean said looking away and out the window.

"I died," i said, the words forming unusually even to my own ears. I died? Holy shit, someone killed me? I didn't even remember that? So much for being powerful. Then i realized something. I'd clearly been dead, i mean, i woke up in the ground, for crying out loud. That should've been obvious. But that didn't tell me much.

"Where's Mara?" i asked, staring at everyone's ashen face. i turned to Dean. "Dean, where is she? She's not de-."

"She's not dead," he said abruptly, refusing to speak and i turned to Sam and Bobby. Sam said nothing, just tapped some keys into the laptop and spun it to me. It had been a google search of Petrelli. Just the name, nothing else.

But there were hundreds of thousands of links. Regretfully, i hit the youtube one. Up came a video of my sister, big wings and all, dropping a man from a twenty story high building. I looked away, sinking into the couch and just sat there.

"When did she-?"

Dean cut me off, "less then a minute after she found your body." He said it so harshly i flinched. He gave me an apologetic look, before turning and going into the kitchen. I watched him pick up a bottle of scotch and then stomp out the door and into the junkyard.

So that was it. She had let go. Just let the demon in her take over. All it had taken was me. Finding me dead. My sister was a demon. God only knows what else had happened. "What's with the wings? Kade had em, know she does? What are we?" i asked, feeling the horror set in. Whatever they were, was eventually going to happen to me. I didn't want to hurt people, i enjoyed helping people, not hurting them.

"I dont know, after she found you, this weird white stuff just fell off of her and burned. She killed Ruby, killed her, killed her, and then she teleported us here and then went back to kill Lilith. But when that stuff finished burning, she grew wings," i suppose i should've worried about how screwed up my life was getting that this was a normal conversation for me.

"What else has she been doing, aside from dropping people from sky scrapers," i said frowning.

"Lucifer's free, we've been more focused on him. Your sisters been destroying, towns cities, they've killed a few hundred people since you've died. We needed enochian just to ward them out of the house. None of the usual demon symbols worked."

"So there not demons, i mean, you said it yourself, angel proofing. But i hate to say it, based on everything i'm seeing, there not all that angelic," i said grimacing. That was even worse. Angel proofing? God, what were we? Maybe i should've been asking that instead of learning how to creep into people's minds. "So what the hell are they?"

"I believe its appropriate to come to the conclusion you fall under the same category, depending on whether or not you give into your demonic self," Cas said from behind me.

"Thank you, i was wondering," i said sarcastically. "What's with Dean?" i asked, listening to gun shots go off. Target practise, by the looks of it drunken target practise. Well he might as well get good at it, based on the endless supply of empty bottles laying around he was having a few more issues then usual.

"Romeo and Juliet got real cozy the night before you died," Bobby said rolling his eyes. Ah, well, that explained it.

"Wow, finally gave in huh?" i asked Sam amused. He just shrugged. Oh that's right, he had been in demon blood detox that day. "What else have i missed?"

"Cas fell," Sam said, glancing back at the angel.

"Fell where?" i asked and then frowned at my own stupid question. "Like, fell fell?"

"Yeah, for Dean, they locked Dean up in this beautiful room or something and left him there while i went to kill Lilith. Killing Lilith was the last seal," Sam said awkwardly.

"So let get this straight. When i died, Castiel fell, you feigned out for demon blood, Mara and Dean got real friendly only for her to turn around and flip her evil switch. All the while you did what?" i asked turning to Bobby. He just glared at me.

"Sorry if my life isn't nearly as exciting," he said moodily and i sighed.

"So where was i then? If i was dead, how come i dont remember anything," i said frowning. I didn't remember anything, nothing. Just going upstairs, taking a few shots and falling asleep.

"Good question," Sam said giving me a small smile. "Where do you think you were?"

"I'd like to say heaven, but, i dont know, Mara remembered everything from hell, but i got nothing," i said shaking my head.

"I wonder who brought you back, you think the angels would?" Sam said, turning to Cas. Who looked like a sorry sight just on first glance. All dishevled, tired and kind of a kicked puppy look on his face. It was rather pathetic in comparison to the first time we'd met him. He was all power back then, but now.

I shook my head, and turned back to Sam's laptop. I didn't know anything, and seeing as all we had were theories and ideas, i may as well find out what my siblings have been up to.

The first link i clicked on read 'hoax explosion set by infamous Petrelli family.' It was an account of a young woman. She described two creatures that looked like angels, but had started killing people whenever someone spoke out at them. That the girl had set fire from one person to the next, all the while singing some kind of song. But it was foreign and no one understood it. The building then collapsed in on itself and they just sort of flew away laughing. As if that hadn't been disturbing enough, there were slightly blurry pictures of them.

"Jesus Christ," i said, staring at an aerial picture taken of a demolished town. It looked like a hurricane had gone through there and then a giant having a hissy fit stomped through the town. It took weeks to recover missing people and almost everyone in the town was dead. According to the police, it was a town known for hiding criminals. They hadn't been hiding there, someone had broken into one of their homes and taken off with her car. Which, coincidentally had been tracked to a local bar and she'd taken her car back after swearing they'd regret pissing her off.

After about the fifth hour i just felt nauseous and i couldn't look at any of it anymore. She was a monster. No wonder why Dean was taking this so badly. Finally giving into your feelings for someone and then bam, not a day later she's the next thing you have to devote your time to trying to kill. Yeah, that would do a number on anyone.

"So, have you guys seen her, has she attacked you or anything?" i asked, bringing Sam, Cas and Bobby out of their readings.

"She painted Dean's car a pink color, and she made it talk like mickey mouse last month, not sure why though," Sam said trying and failing to hide his smirk. Dean loved that car.

"She hasn't tried to hurt you guys?" i guessed hopefully. If she still cared about them, that was a start.

"Not exactly. She came by a few weeks after you died, to get her weapons and whatever else she had here. Dean tried to stop her, and she put him in the hospital," Bobby said, taking his cap off and scratching his head.

"We ran into her six weeks ago at some sort of ritual Lucifer had been doing. She didn't hurt us or anything, but we were seperated and whatever went down between them just totally messed with him. Dean wouldn't talk about it though."

"You have no idea what she said to him?" i asked frowning, we all turned to the door as Dean came strutting in. He had that 'say a word and i'll shoot you' look on his face. "What?" he asked suddenly, realizing all of us were staring at him.

"Did you run out of bullets or booze?" i shot at him bluntly.

"Bite me Bella," he shot, glaring and then stomped off. I sighed.

Yeah, there seemed to be a lot of stuff that needed fixing. I needed to fix my crazy murderous sister, whose new best friend was a brother who'd spent a good year trying to kill us, Cas was a wingless angel and it seemed to be getting worse. Dean was fix kinds of broken and Lucifer was strolling around like this was his planet now. Not to mention the millions of questions that i had and that needed to be answered. Oh yeah, it was great to be back.


	2. Promises of Darkness and Passion

They ran me through just about every detail of their lives up until my calling. They'd been quite busy the last few months. Hunting Lucifer mostly. Apparently he was going to make an appearance at a town called Carthrage, he was raising the horseman.

"Let me see if i have this right," i said staring at all of their expressions. Even Ellen and Jo were here. "You guys are going to Carthrage, which is sure to be crawling with demons, and your planning to shoot him with the demon killing colt, all the while knowing that Lucifer is a freaking angel."

"He bore all demons, i believe it's safe to assume he can be killed by it," Cas said, beer in hand. If that wasn't disturbing enough, watching him sleep had been.

"I dont, that's a horrible plan," i said shaking my head at him. "Lucifer is a demon, you can't an angel with a demon killing gun. Guys, he isn't a demon."

"Do you have any other ideas then?" Dean shot, he'd been moody and bitter ever since i'd appeared in the living room. I couldn't be sure if it was me or something else. Sam said he'd been moody for weeks now.

"Well let's trap him in the holyfire circle thing, that'll hold him long enough for us to stab him wouldn't it?" i asked frowning. There logic was off, and i got the feeling we were grasping at straws here.

"It's a possibility, but we can't be sure he wont have some kind of card up his shirt," Castiel said tilting his head.

"Up his sleeve," i said rolling my eyes at him. "Card up his sleeve. Why are you drinking anyways, your a freaking angel!"

"Dont judge me," he said scowling at me.

"I'm not, i just think it's weird watching an angel get drunk and give in to what is undoubtedly future alcoholism," i shot at him, taking the beer and finishing it in one go.

"Enough you two, get over here, family picture time," Bobby called. I frowned in distaste and Dean dropped his arm over my shoulder.

"If im having a picture taken, you are too," he muttered smirking at my horrified expression. Bobby set a timer, and each of us lined up together. All of us sporting a half smile, half scowl.

We all stood together, having just gotten out of the car, in a ghost town. I had the strangest feeling as if someone was tugging my shirt in a certain direction. Castiel had said reapers were here, but i felt like something else was here. I looked around, not seeing anything, but i felt the reapers. I shook my head, and then put my gun away.

"What are you doing?" Dean asked, staring at me as i pulled my coat off. I tossed it into the car and tied my hair up. It tended to get in my way when i was running.

"I dont know, i need to leave," i said, stretching a little. I was out of practise, without Mara i had no one to pester me into training weekly.

"Leave where?" he asked, grabbing my wrist. "It's too dangerous, your not going anywhere."

"i need to," i said pulling my hand away from his, to stretch again. "Everything about our lives is dangerous, now get out of my way."

"I'm not letting you get hurt, your sister will kill me," he said bluntly, moving to pull out a pair of cuffs. I shifted my body, disolving my center of gravity. It was an unususal feeling, becoming as light as i had. I had flipped up, and caught a railing with a sign and climbed up top of it, standing as if i was on flat ground. Everyone just stared at me, i'd moved so quickly they all just stood there surprised.

"Relax Dean-o, no one can keep up with me when i'm in Ghost Mode," i said smirking, and bounced slightly, ending up on the type of the apartment building. I took off running, following the weird pull.

I ended up moving through an apartment building. Having seen someone in a window. Though this wasn't where the pull was calling me to. I walked down the hallway, hearing several voices. I peeked through a crack in a door, surprised to see Castiel and two other people. Cas met my gaze, averting his eyes quickly. They spoke for a moment, before the other man, who i assumed was Lucifer, disappeared, leaving nothing but the sound of flapping wings. I snorted slightly, i still can't believe they thought the colt would work.

Cas was speaking to the demon, who i learned was Meg and when i got the feeling again i acted this time. I kicked open the door, surprising the demon adn Cas. I jumped, and our bodies collided. We tumbled and her eyes became that demonic black, and i snapped her neck before she could send me across the room. I felt a shiver run up at my spine at the sound, and tried to ignore the satisfied feeling i got.

I slammed a fallen metal rod against a pipe above us, and water spurted out, dousing the holy fire. "Where is everyone else?"

"I dont know, we must stop Lucifer from raising death," he said gravely and i rolled my eyes.

"Yeah, i got that, but where?" he held out his hand, and i took it, the familiar sensation of teleporting still made me nauseous.

We were in some kind of field, and Dean was unconscious, Sam was trying to wake him up. The colt was looking more and more useless. Cas looked exhausted. I stared around at the demons, then my eyes landed on my sister. Who was staring at me in return.

"Holy shit, your not dead?" she asked, sounding so surprised, i almost felt like laughing.

"No, it wasn't you that brought me back?" i asked, staring at her uneasily. Our brother stood next to her, looking at me like i was a bug that needed to be stepped on.

"Obviously not, why would i?" she asked staring at me like i had two heads. I tried not to take offense to that statement, unsuccessfully.

"Mara, what are you doing with Kade, how come you've been hurting so many people?" the look intensified, and i saw Kade's lips twitch in amusement.

"Because it's fun," she said, looking at me like i was crazy now. "Humans are so goddamn pathetic, and there just so breakable."

"What is wrong with you?" i couldn't stop the words from tumbling out and she frowned at me. "You weren't like this before, what's changed, why are you like this?"

She regarded me thoughtfully, and then just smiled at me like she had when we'd first me. Like i was naive and needed to be taught all over again. "Nothing's wrong, i just stopped pretending i was a good little human. Do you know how boring it was, acting like i gave a shit if the world ended? I mean sure, we had our moments, but come on, who wouldn't love this?"

I hated to admit it, but she had a point. I just refused to give into that heartless mindset. i wouldn't, because i was strong. I knew i hadn't thought this way before i'd died. So it was safe in saying something had changed in me while i was dead. But either way, i wouldn't give in. Because i was stronger then that. Because i was stronger then whatever darkness seemed to be in each of us. I would beat it, and when i did, i would fix both of them.

"Come home Mara," i said, trying not to let the guilt sink in. She'd given up when i died, and now look at her. She was just all darkness, everything about her, as beautiful as she always been, but every part of her just screamed darkness. "Please? I want my sister back."

"Your sister died quite some time ago," Kade said amused. "What your looking at now, is a God."

"Could you get a bigger ego," i spat in disgust. i hated the way he seemed to look at her. Like she was a pet, or something to control.

"I could, but i'll settle for what i've got," he said still grinning. Then the demons around us began to drop. The ground started shaking too.

"Bella," Mara said in a sing song voice, smiling as she came to a stand still a few feet in front of me, "you feel that? It's death, want to meet him?"

Someone grabbed my hand, and i turned to see Dean and Sam. Castiel was making his way towards me. Dean was doing everything he could not to look at her, but Sam couldn't stop staring at her.

"What no hello?" she asked, smiling at Dean. She manoeuvred us so quickly i jumped in surprise. She had Dean pressed against a tree. She whispered something in his ear and he paled. Then she stepped back and he just stood there staring into space. Castiel, grabbed him and then they disappeared, he reappeared, taking Sam's hand, who grabbed my arm.

"I'll stop by for a visit!" Mara called grinning like it was christmas morning. I couldn't decide whether or not that was a scary thought. I settled on scary.

Then we were in Bobby's living room. It hadn't occured to me until now that Ellen and Jo were missing. "Where's Ellen and Jo?" i asked, staring at them hard.

"There gone," Sam said bitterly, turning and walking out of the room. Dean looked pretty out of it.

"Gone," i repeated, he didn't mean-?

"They're dead," Dean said quietly. "Jo got mauled by a hell hound, Ellen blew a building up to kill the hell hounds. Jo didn't make it, Ellen didn't want to go anywhere without her."

Bobby and i stared wordlessly and i couldn't help the bitter 'i told you so' run through my mind. I said the colt wouldn't work, but did anyone listen to me? No, and if they had, Ellen and Jo wouldn't be dead right now. I should've made them listen, forced them to stop and think straight, instead of letting them charge into this whole thing blindly impulsive.

I swallowed back the lump in my throat and followed the direction Sam had gone in.

Sam was sitting on the old car that was parked in the field, a tree sitting in the middle of the field. Mara and Dean had spent a lot of time together out here, mostly at night. I moved towards Sam, hesitating at the end of the field. He had his back to me, but i saw him bring his hand over something in an angry motion.

I took a deep breath, forcing away the nervousness and manoeuvered through the field towards him. He didn't hear me come up behind him, which didn't surprise me. My body was still as light as a feather, would be for a few hours. I realized what he'd had in his hand. It was knife, he was driving it into the metal, continously.

I took the knife from him, and he spun in surprise. "Shouldn't play with sharp objects when your upset," i was tossing the knife over my shoulder. I noticed the half empty bottle of whisky next to him and raised my eyebrows, "or drunk."

"I'm not drunk," he lifted the bottle to his lips, "yet."

I was beginning to notice a pattern between the Winchesters. They didn't seem to handle their pain in a healthy way, but then again, none of us seemed to. I mean, look at Mara, i died and she just totally jumped off the sanity boat and into an ocean of psychosis. And all the crap i pulled after the break up with Edward, yeah, not very mature, and in the end that almost got both Mara and me killed. I sighed, mostly to myself and Sam gave me a curious look. I held out my hand and he reluctantly handed it over, thinking i was confiscating it or something. Instead, i long hearty gulp, and then two more, before handing it back.

"Never took you for a drinker," he said thoughtfully, after a few moments of silence.

"Should've seen me after Alaska," i said shaking my head as the memories resurfaced.

"That bad huh?" he said, chuckling in amusement.

"Whatever your imagining, picture that ten times worse," i said bitterly. I wasn't exactly proud of the stunts i'd pulled. But Mara didn't object to any of it, aside from my being gone all night. For most of what i had wanted, i didn't need all night to get any kind of satisfaction.

"We all have our moments," he said shrugging, probably remembering the demon blood. "I missed you," he said after another quiet moment. He turned to me now, that same thoughtful hesitant smile he used to get when he looked at me. A look i hadn't seen since i'd gotten back. I hadn't realized how much i'd missed that look.

"I'd say the same, but i can't remember much," i said shrugging. I didn't remember a thing, just a big blank spot. We still had no idea where i'd been or who brought me back. But Mara had denied being behind it, and she wouldn't deny much of anything, if anything at all.

"Still no idea what happened eh?" i shook my head, taking another drink of the bottle, before passing it back to him once again. "I'm glad your back," he said giving me that smile that i loved.

"I'm glad your still here, it was pretty touch and go the last i remember. You and Dean seemed to be at each other's throats non stop," i said frowning.

"I'm not going anywhere, as long as you dont," he said evenly, giving me a very sober look. "I'm serious. Dont go darkside, and i promise i wont."

I eyed him a moment, getting the feeling he was asking for something else entirely. "I wont go darkside, as long as i have you to keep me good," i said, just as seriously. Sam was like me in a lot of ways, unable to handle the weight on his shoulders. If we used one another to keep control of our darkness then that was fine by me. I knew Sam wouldn't go anywhere, and as long as we had each other as a life boat, we'd make it through this, conscience intact.

He nodded once, a look of decision on his face. He turned slightly, taking the bottle and setting it behind us. He cupped my face, pressing his lips to mine lightly. The kiss was slow and tender, but in less then a few seconds it became heated and raw of nothing but lust.

He stood, not breaking the kiss, and lifted me back slightly, so that i was laying against the hood of the car. I wrapped my arms around him, bringing my hands through his hair and i bit his lip teasingly. He moaned and i grinned up at him.

"Is this okay-?" i cut him off, pulling him in for another hard, wanting kiss.

"Stop talking," i said, wrapping my legs around him and pulling his body into mine even more.

I needed this. I needed Sam, and i got the feeling Sam needed me just as much. After all of the crap that had happened, i needed something that no one else could give me. I needed to know that through all of this pain and confusion, there was still something worth fighting for. I needed to know someone craved me as much as i craved them. That person was Sam. He was in just as much pain as i was, and both of us needed a moment of pleasure, of passion. Something to smile about despite the growing pile of problems. I needed Sam.


	3. Back To Where It All Began

The next morning Dean woke both of us up. He didn't look surprised to find both of us naked in Sam's bed, but didn't comment on it. "We have a problem," was all he said, giving us both a pointed look and leaving the room.

"Shocking," i muttered to myself. God, it was just one thing after a-freaking-nother. I pulled my shirt back on, followed my shorts. I moved towards the door, prepared for overdrive and Sam caught my wrist, spinning me to face him.

"I was serious about what i said last night," he said, all business look on his face.

"So was i," he smiled, and it reached his eyes, which was knew in itself, but i couldn't help the weird feeling that twisted in my stomach knowing i was the cause of that smile. He kissed me lightly, leading me down the stairs and into the living room. Dean was pacing and Bobby just looked pale.

"What's going on?" i asked, frowning at them.

"I may scared of them a little," a familiar and highly amused voice said behind me. Sam and i spun to see Mara leaning against the door frame. "Your sigils are kind of off boys. Whole different species."

"What species would that be?" i asked frowning. So we weren't angels? I hadn't thought so, based on my current attitude, but then again, i wasn't sure what to think.

"Wouldn't want to ruin the punch line, would i?" she asked grinning.

"But you do know," i summarized.

"Mm," was all she said, and everyone tensed as she moved into the room, coming to a stand in front of the books on the desk. "You'll be happily surprised, i'm sure."

"What makes you so sure?" Sam asked coldly, not liking how sure she seemed.

"Because Sammy, i was thrilled, as was our dear brother," she said evenly, not even glancing up as she flipped through the pages of the book of revelations. "So i hear your gunning for Lucifer, quite frankly i think you have bigger fish to fry, but who am i question the Winchester wisdom, i suppose it's more of a Winchester hit list," she said thoughtfully.

"What do you want?" Dean asked harshly. The colt appeared in her hand and she waved it at us, still not looking up from the book.

The colt that each of us had failed to collect before we left Carthrage. "Thought i'd return this, it is useless to the rest of us, afterall," she said flipping it and holding out for Dean to take. He stared uneasily, but took it, careful not to actually touch her.

"Thanks," he said awkwardly, lifting back the end piece to check the ammunition. He clicked the lever into place and pointed it at her. She didn't even look up.

"Might want to save those bullets for someone they can actually kill, i happen to like this shirt," she said and i gave Dean a death glare. He pulled the trigger and i had rushed forward, hitting him hard. We all turned to see her stumble a little, mostly in surprise. She lifted her shirt off, no shame at all as she showed up a black lace bra. She flipped the shirt, staring at the gaping hole in it.

"I aint getting you anymore bullets when you run out, i liked this shirt," she said frowning even more. I turned to Dean, outraged and hit him hard for a second time. I took the gun from him, tossing it across the room, and before i could hit him again strong arms wrapped around me and pulled me off of him. I gave him a good kick in the ribs though.

"Damn Bella, if i had known you were so angry i would've jumped in front of the hunter's ages ago. I heard Gordon Walkers five kinds of crazy, he still up and kicking?" she asked grinning as if she'd said the funniest thing in the world. I wanted to hit her too, and i tried to, but Sam kept hold of me. She grinned even wider.

"What the hell, Bella? What the hell did you hit me for?" Dean asked, holding his head up, blood sliding down his face.

"You shot my sister you ass! With the colt!" i tried to hit him again, but Sam just carried me outside. He set me down and i glared up at him.

"What's got you so pissed off?" he asked frowning at me. "You were fine last night."

I rolled my eyes at him, "oh? Just fine?" he got a weird look on his face and then i couldn't help but laugh at him. He rolled his eyes at me, his cheeks reddening and he said nothing.

I sobered up for a moment and then thought of how to answer a question i didn't even understand.

"I dont know, i'm just so bi-polar lately, it's unnerving."

"You think your sister was like that when she first got back?" he asked, weary of the answer, but needing it anyways.

"I dont know what she was like. You can't compare me to her, or Kade, i didnt grow up the way they did. Up until Edward, i was pretty normal, painfully normal," i said wincing at the idea. I had despised how pathetic my life had been. It was so average, so disgustingly average that i was almost embarrased by it. Mara and Kade were a whole different story.

I could recall the tales she would spin about her and her friends, nothing but excitement and adventure. The stories she would recount were amazing. I could just tell by the gleam in her eyes that she was lying about any of it either. She'd just re-live the moment, but she'd tell me every detail, i envied that. But in hindsight, the normalcy might be what's kept me from going darkside. If they hadn't been part of the supernatural world, i wouldn't have been all that surprised to learn about them being serial killers or something. Mob lords, who knows, maybe they'd crumble the world with nothing but crime. That was a disturbing and yet easy to imagine idea, so creepy it made me shiver.

Sam watched my expressions range from amusement to fear, and just waited patiently. "Weird thought," i said shaking my head at him.

"I know you weren't raised like them, if they even were raised," Sam said thoughtfully. "But, you are blood, whatever is in them, could be in you too. I'm not saying your evil, or going to be, i just think you should be open minded. Maybe once you understand whatever it is that all of you are you'll find peace with it."

"What do you mean, find peace?" i asked frowning at him.

He gave me a weird look, "you dont think i notice that look of fear on your face when you wake up in the morning, or go to bed. Your terrified of whatever you are, because you dont want to turn out like them, you dont want to hurt people. But you have to make peace with it sometime. You are what you are Bella, and that's not going to change, no matter how much you want it to, trust me."

"I'm not afraid of what i am," i insisted.

"No, but your afraid of what you might become," he said evenly, giving me nothing but an honest expression.

I opened my mouth to respond, but no sound came out. "Your nuts," was all that i managed to say, before practically sprinting back inside. Was i really that obvious? That easy to read? God, i hoped not, that was like a big fat sign that read 'im a paranoid freak' across my forehead.

I almost fell face first into the couch, having tripped over a book or something. Someone caught my wrist, and i turned to see Mara giving me an amused curious look. I almost could've forgotten that she was raging muderous monster when she looed at me like that. Almost like she used to gaze at me, like she was my long sister come to show me a bigger world. She had, but now, i just pulled away as if she'd burned me and she looked even more amused.

"You okay Bella?" Bobby asked, from behind the desk. Everyone was staring at me now and Sam just gave me an apologetic look. LIke he hadn't just whammed me with a cold hard truth, the boy had some seriously bad timing sometimes.

"I'm fine," i said scowling at the floor, i turned to my sister, "what do you want? You must be here for something, i mean your not trying to kill one of us, so?"

Everyone tensed, as if expecting her to lash out and hurt me for insulting her, for calling her out. But she had a cold amused look on her face, she'd get that before, but now it seemed like a permanent expression. i was beginning to hate that expression, which was odd considering i used to envy her ability to both terrify and enthrall with a single look.

"What's got you all riled up? Sam unable to satisfy all your little pleasures?" she asked, a contemplative look on her face.

I narrowed my eyes at the comment and just settled for what i hoped was a steely look. She just rolled her eyes, "i said i'd visit didn't i?" We all knew that bullshit, and she knew we knew, she grinned. "I was just curious as to who brought you back."

"We dont know," Bobby said, trying to sound anything but suspicious, but where his tone didn't sound suspicious, his eyes and face gave it away.

"Dont look at me like that, i wouldn't be here right now if i knew," she said as if it were obvious. She had a point.

"What else do you want?" Sam asked frowning, having finally gotten over the insult she'd shot at him. She said nothing, just smiled as if she had a secret. She probably did, but she was frustrating me, i was tired and Sam was too far away from me. Which was kind of sad to admit to myself, considering he was only a few feet away.

"Whatever, if you decide to kill us all, can you wait till i'm done showering," i called over my shoulder, and just walked upstairs. I didn't get a response, but i hadn't expected one.

Mara was still here when i went back downstairs an hour later. I hadn't thought of my family in weeks, or months i suppose was a more accurate time frame. It was strange knowing i had been dead for four months. I vaguely wondered if that meant my birthday was changed. I doubted it. Then i again i hadn't celebrated my birthday and i'd missed my last one.

Mara and Bobby were talking in the study, but Bobby just looked uncomfortable. "Where are the boys?" i asked, trying not to glare at her.

"Buying me a new shirt i hope," she said snorting slightly. I tried not to dwell on that either. Dean had taken a clean shot at her, he'd intended to kill her, one way or another. Didn't he care about her? He must've, or he wouldn't have taken her going darkside so badly.

I went over to a duffel bag, it had my usual stuff in it, but this time i grabbed my old phone. It was the one that Edward had bought me. That seemed like a full time ago, maybe it was considering i'd died. I stared at the phone, turning it on, but the battery was dead. I decided to charge it, see if anyone had called or texted me. I had just taken off with my sister after all. Renee must've told Charlie who i was, what i was doing. But had anyone really looked for me?

I thought of Jake, someone who seemed so innocent compared to everything else around me. I mean, sure, he was a werewolf and i'd always thought of him fondly, his bright smile and how he helped me breathe when it felt like i'd been swallowed whole by pain and spit back out. Yeah, Jake had done wonders for me. I wonder if he missed me.

I turned on my laptop, ignoring the chatter coming from downstairs. I searched up Forks, finding news about missing hikers and missing people from Seattle. Just disappeared, right out of nowhere. Even a young girl.

I blinked, staring at the image in front of me. 'Chief of police found murdered in field'. I dreaded the feeling in the pit of my stomach. I was starting to feel dizzy. I took a deep breath, and read the article below the headline. Yes, it was Charlie. My father was dead. I just stared, trying to make sense of what i was looking at. The thought didn't seem to have any definition, it had just seemed so impossible.

But it wasn't sinking and i suddenly felt like someone was playing some sort of sick joke on me. How could i have not thought of them? Why hadn't i called home, even just to tell someone i was okay? I mean sure, everything wasn't normal, let alone peaceful, but had i really been so wrapped up in my own life that i had forgotten my family? My father was dead, and who knew who else. I knew without a doubt someone had killed Charlie. I intended to find out who. I was going to make them pay.

I shuffled through everything in my room, eventually shoving enough money for three weeks, as well as several weapons and some clothes into a duffel bag. I slipped out the back door, hoping everyone still thought i was upstairs. They would all stop me if i tried to leave or tell them where i was going. Someone was calling me out, at least that's how it felt. It felt like someone was practically shouting my name. Yes. Someone wanted me to come home. That much was obvious. I was going back to Forks. Back to where it had all begun.


	4. Karma Has A Sick Sense of Humour

Forks looked exactly the same as when i had left. I've been gone for over a year now, and not a thing had changed. It was kind of odd really. I never thought i'd come back, but to be fair, i hadn't even thought about whether or not i was going to return. Knowing i had been dead for four months, made it feel like decades, only because my timing was off. One minute it's mid sprint, and now? Now it was winter. It felt wrong somehow, like it shouldn't be this time of the year. I guess my body wasn't adjusting to the huge gap in my memory just yet. I felt like the world had passed me by in the last four months, that everything would be different. But it wasn't. Everything was more or less the same.

I pulled up to Charlie's house, i didn't dwell on how i no longer considered it home. The cruiser wasn't in the driveway, reminding me that Charlie was dead. I had some ridiculous hope that i'd open the door and he'd be sitting there, and get up to hug me cause he'd been worried.

I got out, having spent five minutes just staring at the house. I suddenly wondered if he a will, was there something he wanted to be done after he passed away? Did he want to be buried, cremated maybe? I didn't know, because i wasn't here, no, i was out learning parlor chicks with my bat shit crazy sister. I was out having fun when i should've been here protecting my family and friends. I felt like i'd failed him somehow, that this was my fault.

The door was locked, but i found the spare key in a crack on the siding. I hadn't brought my key with me when we'd rushed out of town, i was too distracted.

It was cold inside, someone must've been in here to turn the power and thermostat off. I moved through the hall into the living room. It was eerily quiet, and the silence was giving me goose bumps.

I wasn't sure what i'd expected to find here. This wasn't where he died, and i got the feeling there wouldn't be any indictation of who'd murdered him. That was an odd thought, Charlie's been murdered. My fathers been murdered, the fact sound like the opposite of that. It sounded wrong and impossible.

I went upstairs, opening his bedroom door. It was so unused that it made a squeaking sound. His room was the same it had always been, bed in the corner, dresser, television and desk. I went to his bed, sitting on it. The blankets were even cold. This was just wrong. Unfair. Impossible. It didn't make any sense, why Charlie?

I mean sure, he wasn't going to win any father of the year competitions but he didn't deserve this. He was a cop, chief at that, he had devoted his life to helping people, and this is all he gets in return. He had helped everyone in this town one way or another, everyone liked him, and his life got cut short because someone wanted to hurt me, they had succeeded.

Charlie was the last person that should've gone out like this was him. He'd had so much time left, and he only gets half of it, when there are murderers and robbers and rapists and this is how he gets repaid? Fourty three years and that's all he gets? There was a long list of people who should've died before him, but that's just how life works. The nice ones always get the shitty end of the stick and bad people dont, or at least they get off easy.

Karma has a sick sense of humour.

I dug through the bag i'd brought over, changing out of my jeans and sweater and into my running gear. I wrapped a sheath around my thigh, tucking in the demon killing knife. I'd snagged it when Sam wasn't in his room. I figured it come in handy, especially if i was on a run with a murderer that might be in the woods.

I guessed it was a pretty stupid idea, going into the woods without back up, but i felt like i needed to do this on my own. I debated whether or not to bring a gun and opted for not and settled on setting a silver knife into my other sheath.

I stretched a little, taking a deep breath. It was sprinkling out, but it didn't bother me. I just dropped my temperature a few degrees and then took another deep breath. I'd found that Mara's lessons on bodily useful at times like this.

"Let's see if i can track this right," i mumbled and pressed my palm to the ground. I took another deep breath, falling out of my body. Astral projection wasn't my best area of expertise, mostly because it made me nervous and out of control. I looked around, glancing down at my physical self. She had her head bowed and it looked almost like she was frozen. I found the whited out eyes a little scary, but turned my attention back to my surroundings.

I heard a gun shot to my right, and my head snapped in that direction. I saw what looked Charlie shaped, and then he began walking. I fell back into my body, and then took off running after the figure.

It led me to a small clearing, one right on the edge of La Push. I took a deep breath, calming my heart rate in a second. I had the oddest sensation of being watched, which i'd felt since i got into Forks.

I took a few steps forward, looking for any kind of clue. I wasn't sure what i was looking for, blood, clothing? Anything? If the cops had moved his body, it'd be weird for them not to take evidence with them.

After moving through the tall grass, i found a huge rock in the far right corner, covered in blood. I pressed my palm over it, and jumped when thunder sounded. Then it began to wore, "damn," i muttered, attempting to ignore it. I took another deep breath, feeling the world spin as i fell from my body again.

I looked down. This time the Charlie figure was Charlie. He was on the ground right behind me, and he was cursing and shooting at the figure above him. But i couldn't see much of their face, just red eyes. Vampires? A vampire had killed Charlie? That didn't seem right, the only one who'd try and hurt me that way was probably Tanya, Edward's girlfriend or Edward himself. Being humiliated like that in front of your family would do a number on anyone. But i had made it clear they leave me alone, and i gave them first hand proof of how serious i was.

Something growled behind me and i turned. A huge black wolf had leapt at me, sending me crashing back into my body painfully. I hit the ground hard, and tried to push back the nausea. I lifted my silver blade, taking a shot at the wolf. I missed and they pulled back, seeing the weapon. I pulled my legs to my chest as he leapt at me and as he made contact, i kicked out hard and he went flying backwards. I jumped back up, flipping the knife so i could grip it properly. The blade itself was pointed inwards, but i preferred to swing my arm with the blade pointed in the opposite direction of the swing.

The wolf ran back towards me, and then i heard another growl. It was coming from behind me. I could just hear my sisters voice, like i always had in a fight. It was my way of telling myself how to fight. The orders just came more naturally then my own, i wasn't always sure how to manoeuvre. 'Jump,' her voice spoke, and without a moment to think, i jumped. They collided, and i leaned forward slightly, and when my opened hands met the ground, i pushed off, flipping into a soft land. I turned, seeing movement on my left, a grey wolf running at me.

I turned as they got within a few feet of me and i threw up a shield, and they went backwards and back into the woods. I turned again, hearing howling in the direction i'd come from. I ran straight back into the woods, jumping and throwing my body as far as i could. I was suddenly extremely pleased that i'd gotten so good at this, and i was fast, faster then the wolves. All of that intense training had paid off. Feeling almost no gravity helped too.

I had been running for a few minutes now when i heard movement keeping time with me about a yard away, and they were angled, they run right into me. I turned some, pushing that way. Something came right up on my side and launched themselves at me. I wasn't sure if i should jump or slide, but listened to my inner Mara. I dropped, sliding under a fallen log, as they went straight over me, right at the spot i'd just been in. I jumped back into a stand, and started running again.

They caught up again, having circled back around and they threw themselves into me. We crashed through a tree, both of us barely rolling out of the way as the tree came crashing down. 'There are too many on the ground level, take the trees,' she said, that same demanding tone. I did what the voice said, kicking off of a tree and then grabbing a branch. I swung once flying into the air upside down and as i flew over a branch, i twisted, and gripped it.

As i came to a fast stop, i took another deep breath and began running straight across the branch. When it got too thin i jumped, doing the same with next tree, jumping when i had to. I wasn't sure where i was, but as i saw an opening to a field. I was wrong.

I flew straight over the cliff, barely, reaching out and grasping the ledge. I got my other arm up, and pulled. I could hear the waves crashing below me, but i heaved myself up, instead of panicking. 'Use your feet, that's what their for,' she said unimpressed. I tried not to scowl and then tried to get some grip with my foot. I took another deep breath, pushing away the gravity again. I got up, stumbling and a little breathless. I stood up, debating whether or not to climb down or run the long way and back into the woods.

Before i could decide another grey wolf exploded from the trees and sent us both flying off the cliff. I dived, pushing myself upwards as hard as i could. It was then that i saw the wolf, the bubbles having cleared. He was headed straight for me. I began swimming towards the shore, falling under the surface a few times.

I staggered out the water, i saw the red and black wolf emerge from the woods next to the cliff and i began running down the shoreline. I decided to stop and make a stand, maybe shield everyone before making another break for it.

I threw a shield up, and shoved them back a little. They all growled and leapt for me when the red one stopped. He stared at me for a moment, almost in shock and then he was human. It was Jake. "Jake?" i asked incredulously.

"Guys stop, it's Bella," Jake said, still in shock.

"Dude your naked," i said in horror, and his face went red and he pulled on some shorts. Everyone else did the same and we just kind of stared at one another. Sam was here, and boy i didn't recognize.

"Bella, as in Isabella Swan?" Sam asked, already glaring at me.

I frowned, not liking the tone he had. "No, im the tooth fairy, who did you think you were attacking?"

"Where have you been, and what are you?" Sam asked, almost sounding like a threat.

"Dead," i said snorting slightly.

"Your a leech?" Jake asked in disgust.

I tilted my head, "no?"

"A vampire?" i asked confused, they nodded, "ew, god no."

"Bella you've been gone for over a year, where the hell have you been?" Jake asked now, a hurt look on his face.

"I told you, dead, or trying not to end up dead, not neccessarily in that order though," i said amused.

"Bella i dont know how to tell you this," hear it comes, i thought unamused, "Charlie's dead."

I eyed him a moment, "yeah, i know, that's why i'm here now."

"You have a lot of explaining to do, come with me," Sam said coldly, turning and walking away.

"What crawled up his ass and died?" i muttered, both of them gave me a weird look and i just rolled my eyes. This oughta be good, i thought sighing.

None of us spoke until we got to a small little two story house. Sam was a cop, i had forgotten about that. I could smell muffins from inside before i even got to the porch. The senses were heightened as much as the rest of my body, and they all worked at the same pace, so whenever i got gravity back wholly, everything from sight to smeel, to hearing would be enhanced.

There were two other boys sitting in the room, eating. Like animals, no pun intended. "Sam?" a girl said, frowning at me wearily and then looking at his angry expression. I smirked.

"This is Bella, Charlie's daughter," Sam said trying to soften his tone a bit, he failed.

It just occured to me that the wolf that had attacked Mara and me was Sam. I had completely forgotten La Push harboured a pack of shape shifters. I should've just told him it was me, but that might've proved difficult if he didn't stop to listen. But then again, Sam had never really liked me, and liked me even less after the incident with Mara. It wasn't my fault they pissed her off.

"Oh," she said, and tried for a sympathizing tone.

"Dont need a pity party," i said rolling my eyes. Sam growled lowly and i snickered . "Dont be such a little bitch Sam."

"Dont push me Bella, your in enough trouble already."

"What are you going to do, ground me?" i asked grinning. I still couldn't believe i'd forgotten about the pack. Sure i didn't know them all that well, but you'd think someone would remember there was a pack of shape shifters down the road, despite being distracted.

"Wouldn't be hard," he said bluntly, full on ego speaking.

"Should we test that theory? I did just kick your ass," i said my turn to smirk, when his face fell.

"What?" one of the boys asked confused, turning to stare at him.

"I have you trapped in a house, i think that would put the odds in my favour," he said darkly.

"Really? Weird. I'm surprised you could get into the house at all with an ego twice it's size," he leapt at me, shoving me against the wall. I could feel his tremors out of rage. "I didn't hurt your feelings did i?"

"Sam, your going to hurt her," a voice said from behinds us scared.

"Yeah Sam, your going to hurt me," i mocked. I threw up a shield, making it burst and he fell into Jake.

"Enough, both of you," Emily said sternly. "What's going on here?"

Neither of us said anything so she turned her gaze to me. I rolled my eyes again, "i came to find out what happened to Charlie, so i went to the clearing where his body was discovered. Sam the vampire slayer and a bunch of other wolves ambushed me."

"Your not dead?" another younger voice asked.

We all stared at him a moment, "clearly," was all i said.

"How were you able to move like that? You weird when you left but you did anything like that," Jake wondered.

"Lots and lots of practise," i said shrugging, trying to sound nonchalant and not bragingly.

"You were faster then us, you can't possibly be human," Sam argued.

"Well i can die like one and bleed like one, so i think that kind of proves i am. Or is there a handbook on how to be human?"

He glared. "Why do you care about Charlie all of a sudden, he died three months ago."

"Does it matter, i'm here now," i said coldly. "Do you know who killed him?"

"A leech, red headed one," Jake said, watching realization dawn me.

"Are you fucking kidding me? Victoria? Do you know where she is?" i asked outraged. She was dead. She was deader then dead. She was dead a hundred times over.

"You know who she is?" Sam asked suspiciously. "We dont know where she is, but she's been circling the area."

"Yeah," i said, ignoring them for a moment. I thought about how to do this, and the only place i could think of her being, was in Seattle. But after that i wasn't sure where to look for her. She could be anywhere, i didn't know her well enough to figure out where she'd be.

"This little reunion has been great, but i need to go," i said going towards the door.

"No, not until you tell us what you are and where you've been," Sam saiud grabbing my arm and pulling my backwards. I stumbled, falling into him and he moved to block my exit. "Dont make me force the answers out of you."

"You want to fight, fine, then i'll give you one," i said, pulling my blade out. I whipped it at him and he moved out of the way before it got too close. The turn took his focus off me and when he turned back a round i sucker punched him. He went backwards, and then leapt at me. I side stepped, kicking his legs out from under him. He stumbled, and then someone shoved me against the wall and i centered myself.

Turning they raised a fist to hit me and i moved to the left slightly. I grabbed the back of his head shoving it at the wall. Sam rushed me, i jumped up, wrapping my legs around his neck and then twisted my body. We spun sideways and he crashed to the ground when i made an easy land. I moved to run for the door only to take a punch on the side of my face. My feet left the ground and i fell straight into the glass coffee table. It shattered under the impact and i felt glass cut into my back. I rolled, stumbling.

Sam was already up and colliding with me and we went straight through the living room window and onto the porch. We crashed into the railing, and that too snapped under the pressure. We rolled on the gravel and i tried not to think about the blood sliding down my arm or head. I jumped back up, turning to make a run for it again.

Someone wrapped their arms around me and when another unnameable person ran at us. I jumped, kicking him hard, and he flew straight into the cruiser. I forced my body forward, forcefully flipped him over me and onto the ground. I ran straight at the house jumping up onto the hood of the car. I bent my knees a little, pushing off of it and then catching the ledge of the roof. I pulled myself up effortlessly and then jumped off of it and straight into the woods.


	5. Painful Revelations and Harsh Truths

I went home, deciding to go to the cemetery. I wanted to see Charlie's grave, to say goodbye. I changed into some jeans and a sweater. It was still pouring outside, and i didn't have a rain coat, so i just pulled on my leather jacket.

The pack hadn't followed me home, thankfully. That only meant they knew i wouldn't be a threat to anyone, or at least they didn't think i would be. That gave me a few hours to recover from the fight, a few hours to search the town.

There was a new row in the cemetery, and as i walked to the edge, i realized all of the deaths were recent. Victoria, no doubt. I came to a halt, staring down at the plane little black plaque fastened into the earth.

_Charlie Swan_

_Giving Friend, Loving Father_

It read the date as well, but only the years. I dropped to my knees, not even feeling the mud beneath me. "Oh Charlie," i whispered, the rain slid down the black rectangle and i felt my throat constrict painfully. "I'm so sorry," i whispered, a sob escaping. It was like a flood gate, as soon as the first sob broke free, the rest did.

I got control of myself pretty quickly once i realized i was breaking down in a cemetery during a downpour and i took a deep shaky breath. "You didn't deserve this," i said, staring down at where his body was sure to be. "This is my fault, i should've known Victoria was still out there. I should have realized there would be consequences for just running away. God, Charlie i'm so sorry."

I looked up, nothing but darkness shining down on me with the rain. I wasn't sure if God could hear me, but i said it anyways. "This is supposed to your world, you created us, you made us humans weak. How can you expect people to fall in line and have faith when your nowhere? How do you expect any of us to survive when people like me are running around destroying everything. Destroying families, and lives and homes. Your supposed to protect us, Charlie spent his whole helping people and this is what you give him?"

I got no response, only more thunder and rain. I looked back down at the plaque and the air around me stopped feeling empty. A shadow stood over me and a hand reached out for mine. I turned to see Mara standing there, an unreadable expression on her face. I looked back down, before accepting the offered hand.

"How'd you find me?" i asked, voice a little raw.

"You weren't exactly subtle about taking off. You left your computer on, you left the browser on," i groaned, of course i had. I hadn't even exited out of the windows, man i really need to think stuff out more.

"Are Sam and Dean with you?" i asked a little hopefully.

"Not yet, they'll be here by morning, i flew," she said, as if it were obvious.

"You weren't worried about the lightning?" i asked frowning in disapproval.

"If i can walk through fire, would lightning really be all that different?" she countered and i said nothing.

"You wont tell me what the hell we are, so how should i know?" i shot back in a clipped tone, and she gave me an eye roll.

"So who killed your dad?" she asked nonchalantly.

I felt my fists clench and i ground out, "he was your dad too."

"He was my biological father, i dont have a 'dad'," she said simply. "So who killed him?"

"Victoria, she's been trying to get in for the last six months. She's pissed off because Edward killed her mate when he tried to kill me," i said glaring at the ground. The street light above us flicked and then burst. I felt my eyes widen a little and then took a deep breath. I needed to get better control of my emotions.

"So what, you came here to kill her or something?" she asked amused. "Quite venegeful aren't you?"

"Screw you," i said slamming the door harder then neccessary.

"Dont be such a baby Bella, you came here to kill the chick that killed your dad, i did the same," i rounded on her frowning.

"What do you mean?"

She grinned a little, "Lilith set fire to my home, after murdering my younger siblings and my parents. Why do you think i hated Kade so much, he was siding with the girl that killed our only family."

I stared mutely, unsure of what to say. I brushed past her, going into the kitchen. Sure enough all of the food in the house had been taken, whatever alcohol included. "So why are you still here? I would've thought you'd left to go see Kade or something."

"Our brother went to Austrailia, didn't care enough to ask why," she said shrugging.

"So? That still doesn't tell me why your here."

"I want to be around when you flip your switch," she said honestly.

"I wont," i said defensively.

"I think you will. Look at yourself Bella, your nothing but angry and hurt, of course you will. It's just a matter of time. All that buried emotion will just boil over one of these days and then you'll want to join us, and i'm saving you the trip of tracking us down," she said it so matter-of-factly like it was set in stone that i suddenly found myself doubting my own self control.

That's what triggers us, wasn't it? The lack of self control, the weak emotional control. Kind of reminding me a rubber band, it was flexible, but it would always return it's orginal size, but if you pushed too far, it would break.

Something dawned on me. Will i be struggling to keep control over my own darkness for the rest of my life? Will everyday be spent in constant inner turmoil? If i was like this for the rest of my life, then she was right, i'd eventually give in, even i didn't mean to.

"I'm nothing like you Mara. We may have a common bloodline, but i'm not you. I never will be, i can't be. You say i'm the angry one, the one in pain, you've got that backwards. Your suffering ten times more then i am."

She quirked an eyebrow at me, asking me to explain who i'd come up with that. "You dont believe me? Then hows this for proof. You lash out when someone upsets you, killing people as if you were a giant having a temper tantrum. You spent five years in hell, being tortured the entire time. Your whole family was murdered while you were down there, so you couldn't save them. The brother you idolized and loved, your twin brother at that, killed you without a second thought, along with your friends. You woke up to find out that you had to go to war all over again, all the while terrified of the fact that you couldn't kill your own brother, but he could kill you. You went from the fire and into frying pan and now your in denial, not to mention the boat load of guilt you have because you failed to save the people you loved, myself included. So no, i dont think i will end up like you because i didn't live a life of pain and hate. I'm stronger then you only because im not as damaged or broken as you are, and you were broken long before you died, hell just added fuel for the fire."

She stared at me for a moment, contemplating my little speech and then just grinned. "Well in that case, i guess its a good thing i dont feel much anymore."

I just shook my head at her and went back upstairs to take a shower. I was tired, and now that my body had turned to it's natural state the pain had kicked in. I guess it was kind of like an adrenaline rush. You feel nothing but strength for a few short minutes and then you just feel exhausted after the big energy drain.

I was sick of my sister being so difficult since i got back, from wherever i'd been. I hated seeing her like this. So empty of feeling, it made me feel worse. She had done this because of me, and now that i was back, i doubted she could even return to her former self. Even if she did, i didn't think she'd ever be entirely the same.

Or maybe i just didn't like seeing her this way because it was a constant reminder of what i could turn into. With each day, the concept seemed more and more likely to happen, and then what? I get murderous and cruel? The idea wasn't appealing in the slightest. Sure i was angry, and yeah i wanted revenge, i wanted to get justice for Charlie, but that didn't make me blood thirsty, right? If someone tried to stop me, would i kill them too just for getting in my way? I hoped i wouldn't but it was hard to tell how i'd react when the time comes.

The doorbell rang, right as i finished dressing and i moved down the stairs quickly. Mara being in the house made me even more alert and on guard. She was a flight risk and too unpredictable for me too relax. One wrong word or look and she'd lash out. Something as simple as small talk about a movie could go downhill quickly with her around.

I opened the door, seeing none other then Carlisle and Alice. I didn't even hesitate and just slammed the door shut. I turned to walk back into the living room, and they came in anyways, i should've locked the door, though it wouldn't deter them.

"Whose here?" Mara asked frowning at me. They came in behind me and Mara just stared at them.

"We need to talk Bella," Carlisle said calmly.

"I'm not feeling very chatty today, maybe you should come back some other time, say a hundred years from now?" i asked, my voice taking on an acidic turn.

"What do you want?" Mara asked in disdain. At least that hadn't changed.

"Sam told us you came home," i raised my eyebrows. That was a weird image, a werewolf texting one of the Cullen's. "I'm sorry about Charlie."

"Cool," i said coldly. I had hoped to avoid peoples pity, it was weak and humiliating to me.

"I'm told your aware of Victoria trying to get into Forks," he said next, and i shrugged. "There's going to be a war on Saturday. Victoria's been building an army and she's bringing all of the newborns here to fight. We've called an alliance with pack to work as a team."

"How many newborns?" Mara asked curiously. But i could see the excited gleam in her eyes, and tried not to comment.

"About twenty," Alice said, trying to sound like she was worried.

"We believe it would be best for your safety if you stayed with us for the duration of the fight," Carlisle said next.

"No way in hell," i said glaring. "If that's all, can you get the fuck out of my house?"

"Bella, we just want you to be safe," Alice said pouting a little.

"I can protect myself," i said in annoyance. "Like i said get out, and if you dont, i know Mara would love nothing more then to rip you to shreds." Mara just grinned in agreement.

They left, thankfully. Both of us sat there quietly for a few minutes until Mara suggested going on a run. It was still pitch black outside, but i let my eyes adjust to the night and my vision intensified. We had been running for over an hour when we entered a clearing with a bunch of people. It was the whole pack and the Cullens, it looked like they were sparring or something.

I paused for a moment on the branch i stood on, and pushed off of it and onto the ground. Mara followed suit and everyone turned to stare at us. "Kind of late for a tea party isn't it boys?" Mara asked amused.

"What are you two doing here?" Tanya asked, taking Edward's hand possessively. I tried not to smirk.

"I could ask all of you the same thing," i said just as coldly.

"Mara, your all over the news, the one who keeps murdering people," Edward said in contempt. As soon as he finished that thought, two wolves ran straight at her. As shield exploded from me, sending everyone backwards either in the air or stumbling. The shield had missed Sam though, who ran at her and they collided and flew through the tree line a few feet. I turned to help her, when Sam came out, and i barely ducked in time for him to fly over me and into Edward.

She came out, eyes full of fire, and the ground began to shake. Jasper ran at her and she side stepped and then shoved him hard. He fell into the ground, and as she turned back around, Emmet attacked her. They rolled and when they came to a stop, he had his hand around her throat. She brought her hands to his face, and fire burned his skin. She took the chance to flip them, and Jasper grabbed her and pull her off of him.

She turned, catching his fist and she twisted it. I heard a bone break and she kicked his knees and he fell forward. She snapped his neck and before anyone else could move, i threw a shield up separating us from them. "Enough," i shouted loudly. Everyone froze. "One of these day she's going to kill all of you, just because you keep pissing her off. You can't win a fight against her, so stop trying, your way out of your league when it comes to us. I suggest you back off unless you want to die here and now, and dont think i wont help her, because i will."

Everyone was silent for a moment and i assumed they took the threat seriously. I walked back into the woods and made my way back home. I was so sick and tired of all of this. The non stop fighting, the growing pile of problems. I was starting to wish i had stayed dead, or at least that she had never come looking for me.


	6. Medea, Jason and The Origin Of Mermaids

_Bella POV_

_Mara drove us up a small stretch of road, when we had to come to a stop at a gate. She came to a stop, and she stared at the chain and lock. Then it started to push in the opposite direction of us. The metal dented and then the chain burst and the gate swung backwards in a forceful swoop. _

_She drove through, leaving the gates the way they were. "Who owns this property?" i asked her frowning. _

_"The Volturi," i turned to her quickly. _

_"They hate us enough and know you want to break in?"_

_She tilted her head slightly, amused, "of course, dont you?"_

_I paused, remembering our little show down with them. "Okay, maybe just a little," i admitted. _

_We pulled up to a two story house on a hill. I could see the water from here. We were on the ledge of the island. "Wow," i said, getting out. _

_I went to the ledge, looking down. The waves were crashing into the bottom of the cliff, causing splashes of white to jump around, there was nothing but water below us. The field around us was covered in beautiful plant life, ranging from one color to the next. The grass was about a foot high too. I sat down, letting my legs hand off the ledge. I guess i should've been nervous about faling, but i knew i probably wouldn't even hit the water if i fell. _

_Mara sat next to me, looking up thoughtfully. "What do you know about Greek Mythology?" she asked, not looking over at me. _

_"Not much," i admitted. "What kind of Greek Mythology?"_

_"Legends," i paused, thinking over a few of the names and stories i did know about and just shook my head. "Have you heard of Medea, the witch, or Jason and the Golden Fleece?"_

_"Vaguely."_

_"Medea was beautiful, well respected and often viewed as one of the greatest sorceresses in Greek Mythology. She was a witch of Hecate and being the daughter of King Aeetes, and the granddaughter of Helios, who was a son God. She also had a younger brother, Absyrtis. Jason wanted his father's Golden Fleece, but they were denied. Medea fell in love with Jason, and he used that to his advantage, promising to marry her if he helped her. _

_"When Jason and Medea succeeded, they fled in, taking Medea's brother with them. But they were persued, to delay them, Medea murdered her brother, and dismembered him. She tossed the pieces into the waters, so that the pursuit would be delayed. They'd need to stop to retrieve his remains for burial. _

_"When they returned, Jason set about exploiting her sorcery. She returned his dying father, Aeson, his youth. When Medea cast a spell on the the three daughters of KIng Pelias, who killed him, they had flee once again. _

_"They resided in Corinth, where Medea bore two children. When Jason abandoned her, to marry the daughter of Creon, who was a king. But Medea was a witch, a witch with a thirst for revenge and she set about causing him pain. She murdered her children first, to cause him pain. Followed by the death of his father._

_"Now here's where things get confused. The humans believe Medea killed Jason's bride, she didn't. She cast a spell on her, which transformed her into a hungry sea creature. I'm sure you know what kind. She was trapped underwater, never able to leave or move on, to never die. Jason didn't know what had become of his wife, but he did know Medea was behind it. he confronted her, demanding answers. She told him to go to a small island on two days by boat in the west. When Jason came upon the island, him and his crew saw her on the island. She was singing to them, a voice so beautiful the crew never noticed the rocks surrounding them, but she couldn't stop singing, not matter how hard she tried. They crashed, and one by one the men on the ship died, Jason made it to the shore, when she attacked him, consumed with a never ending hunger."_

_I was quiet for a minute before turning to her, "she ate him?" she nodded, "all of him?"_

_"Yeah, pretty much, just goes to show, never piss off jealous witches," she said smirking. _

_"No kidding," i said shivering, that was disturbing. The idea of an angry woman turning you into a mermaid, and then making you so hungry you eat the person your in love with. Yeah, that's pretty fucked up. _

_I had slipped out of the hotel room a little after one. Mara was asleep in the next room, we always left the door open when we had adjoining rooms. I leaned against the open door, watching her with my arms crossed. She was having another nightmare. _

_Her breathing was unsteady, laboured and she kept tossing and mumbling, but she was otherwise asleep. Seeing as she refused to help me what she dreamt about, i could only assume it was hell. But to be fair, she could be dreaming about anything really, she's told me very little about her life before she died, but it wasn't hard to tell that she'd never had a peaceful happy life. When she snapped at me for asking so many questions about her past, i was left to resort to other ideas. I didn't like what i found. _

_I had gone through newspaper records of the places she used to live and got over a hundred results for each place. All about gang wars, shoot outs, car accidents, larceny, murder, and the list went on. Most of the news couldn't identify who controlled the small group of criminals, but she seemed to get into more trouble then everyone else. Which also didn't surprise me. Kind of like a pack of werewolves, if you wanted to be alpha, you had to take out the current alpha. _

_From what i had pieced together, she spent most of her life avoiding police, never staying in one place too long. She had a lot of associates as well, so i didn't doubt her ability to re-create a new army. She never stayed at her home, and if she did visit her home, it was to visit her family for a few hours. Usually by the time the police got word of her being at home, she'd already be long gone. Whenever she did get arrested, it didn't last long. _

_I shook the thoughts from my mind, grabbing my coat and the keys for the rental we'd gotten. I didn't tell her what i knew about her, about all that i'd found out, she'd probably just shut down as soon i brought any of it up. _

_We'd passed a bar on the way into town, and seeing as i didn't know where any of the other bars were, i went there. It was more of a dive bar then anything. Low lighting, smoke filling the atmosphere mixed in with the smell of sweat and beer. There weren't a whole lot of people in here, but that didn't bother me much, i had my gun with me and a butterfly knife. Mara insisted i carry two weapons on me until i was done with the training. I didn't disagree, especially when we didn't know what Kade could be thinking. _

_I ordered a drink, the bartender didn't even bother asking for ID. "What's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" an amused man asked, as he sat in the chair next to me._

_I didn't comment on how cliche that line was and just lifted a beer slightly. "You couldn't be more then eighteen, but who am i to judge? My names Brian," he said and i shook his hand._

_"Katie," i said giving him a smile. _

_"Can i get you another drink?" he asked returning the smile. Brian couldn't have been any older then twenty five. He was good looking enough, but i could tell already he was a total player. _

_Many drinks later the bar was closing and we left as the lights went out. We'd been the last people to leave, it was probably going on four by now. He hadn't left when his friends did, so i offered a ride home. We didn't even make it to the car. _

_Something hit him from behind and he hit the ground, and both of us turned to see Kade standing there. _

I shook the image from my mind, sighing deeply. I rememered how bad she looked when i woke up. Her body had been covered in bruises and cuts, and even though she didn't voice it flinch, it was obvious she'd been in a lot of pain. We had been in the car, and we'd gone straight to the airport. I didn't think i'd been passed out very long when Mara had shown up looking for me.

She told me what happened, bit by bit and the more she spoke, the more tired she looked. When she told me that she had the chance to kill him, that she couldn't do it, her eyes just showed complete and utter defeat. i didn't feel the need to point out what all of the consequences would be, she already knew what would happen. i think that was the moment she had started to give in, then it was just a matter of time.

"You think we should go to the war tomorrow?" i asked, Mara grinned, "dont accidently kill the wrong person either."

"It's good training, putting you under pressure shows how well you work if you get jumped or something," she said shrugging. She stood, "anyways, i'm going to the bar, you want to go?"

I eyed her a moment, she didn't seem to have an ulterior motive, "sure."


	7. Im Me, Too Bad I Dont Have A Name For It

***Quite a bit of COARSE LANGUAGE in this chapter!**

Bella POV

I was pretty hung over the next morning, and i spent most of it trying overcome the hang over. Mara acted completely normal, which left me to wonder why i felt like total crap and she didn't. She just looked at me oddly when i pointed out, "you know, i was wondering why you were acting like a dying dog or something."

"What are you talking about?" i asked frowning.

She raised her eye brows in an unimpressed manner, "you can control your body Bella, it's a vessel, nothing more. What we are doesn't function on God's vision for humans, it surpasses that. Were pure power, harness it, you want your body to change, then make it. Thought you'd be smart enough to figure that out by now."

I glared at her, i hated when she spoke to me like that. Before i could respond someone knocked on the door. I left the room, deciding to be the bigger person. "Hey guys," i said awkwardly to the Winchesters, who were both frowning at me in utter disapproval.

"You didn't have to take off you know," Sam muttered, leaning over and kissing me once Dean walked around the corner.

I closed the door, not bothering to lock it. I wasn't exactly worried about people who'd be detered by a locked door. I kissed him back, noting the obvious calm that swept over me in the light touch. We both jumped, coming out of the staring contest when we heard Dean swear loudly and then what sounded like crashing glass.

I sighed, and then went back into the main area. "What are you doing to him now?" i asked running a hand through my hair in annoyance. Mara looked completely innocent, which made it all the more obvious she'd provoked him and Dean was glaring at her as if she were the Devil in disguise or something, but knowing Mara, she might be.

I stared at the mess on the ground and glared, "one of you is cleaning that crap up and if you dont, neither of you is coming to the fight today." I took Sam's hand, and led him upstairs to my bedroom, where i locked the door behind us.

I heard them bicker downstairs, along witht he sounds of more breaking and a door slam. Then the sounds of broken glass moving across the floor. Probably Dean, Mara wouldn't clean anything up if her life depended on it. "How you holding up?" Sam asked, watching me closely.

I turned to him, swallowing the lump in my throat and tried to smile, failing in the process. "Horrible, stupid pack in La Push tried to kill me, Mara was a pain in the ass all the night, and she got us into a bar fight somehow. We were arrested, and she was so drunk it took her three hours before she was finally able to use enough power to get us the hell out of the drunk tank. Charlie's dead, and crazy vampire with a bad hair cut is trying to kill me, i'm being stalked by my ex and their family, and i can see them outside as we speak," i hissed angrily, Sam stilled, and then turned to the window, which he closed, along with the blinds.

I laid back on the bed, sighing. "I'm tired of this crap Sam, i just-," i took a shuddering breath, telling myself to save it for the fight. "I'm going to rip that bitch apart," i said so calmly, he just stared at me for a moment.

"I used to talk like that, when Dean died," he said looking away guiltily. "Then when he came back, it didn't make it any better, it didn't matter. I wasn't angry at Dean, or Lilith, or anyone really, but myself. For not being able to save him. Still am, but you need to be careful with that kind of hate, because it brings power, a power that can take over you at any moment if your not careful."

He turned back to me and i smiled at him softly, sitting up, "i gave you my word i wasn't going anywhere, didn't i?"

"Just be careful, i dont want you to turn into your sister, because we dont even know how to fix her yet, and if someone as good as you can go bad, then someone like me definitely will," i was starting to doubt how good i really was, but i didn't verbalize it.

I heard Dean swear downstairs, and then Mara burst out laughing and both of us flinched when Dean punched something.

Quietly, i whispered, "She's breaking his heart, isn't she?"

Sam said nothing, and just looked down at the carpet. I saw the barest movement, as he nodded once and i bit my lip.

Dean was broken enough, there was only so much he could handle, and she wasn't helping the situation much. If we didn't get Mara back, then we'd lose Dean too. I wasn't sure how we'd lose him, i just knew we'd lose him. And if we lost Dean, Mara had no reason whatsoever to go back to normal. I mean, who want to, if you finally got your humanity back, and all you had was guilt because you drove the person you were in love with to utter despair, and possibly even death. There was no point having a soul if-, "holy shit that's it!" i shouted jumping up in surprise.

Sam was looking at me as if i'd lost my mind. "Bella?"

It all made sense now! Well maybe not total sense, but i got the gist of it all. There were a lot of holes, but i can't believe how obvious the answer was. "Bella, what's it?" Sam asked frowning at me, as i paced the room.

Sam grabbed me when i didn't respond, spinning me to him, "what are you talking about? What's it?"

I went to explain everything, but then snapped my mouth shut, biting down on my tongue painfully. I stared up at him, realizing i couldn't tell him. I needed Mara close and she would bail at the first sign of trouble. I had gotten good at hiding my thoughts from her, so i wasn't too worried about her figuring out my plan. First i fixed Mara, then i could fix Kade, then it'd all be over and done with. We could finally be a family. Maybe. If one of us doesn't die in the process, and in this family, it seemed more and more likely.

Sam and i were in the middle of a very intense moment when Mara shouted at us to come downstairs. Sam was on top of me and both of us were in quite a compromising position. "I know what your doing and i dont give shit! Get down here!" she shouted angrily and i tried not to set make the room burst with energy as my temper rose.

"Should we-?" Sam started and moved off of me at my nod. I pulled on a pair of panties and my shorts, then pulled on a shirt as i stumbled down the stairs.

"What?" i snapped annoyed, and then stared at the group of people in my living room. I blushed furiously, realizing they'd all seen the top half of me naked, however briefly.

"If you and Sam hadn't been so busy getting sticky you would've heard our guests," Mara said smirking at me.

"What do you want now?" i asked frowning at the Cullen's.

"I had a vision of you briefly at the battle, we needed to know if you were going to be present," Alice said awkwardly.

"You couldn't pick up a phone?" i asked in disbelief.

They glanced at one another, and i rolled my eyes. "Yes, were coming, you want to give us a time, latitude, longitude, maybe? Or how about you jot down the exact directions in case i get lost? I mean, a big vampire, shape shifter war, i must be retarded not to be able to find it, that's why your here after all, right? To piss me off and condescend to me? Like i couldn't end every single person in this room if i didn't want to."

Everyone was quiet and i waited, "what the hell is wrong with you?" Mara asked seriously, but then burst out laughing. "Jesus, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed."

"Okay, you know what? Bite me Mara!" i said angrily. She raised her eyebrows, challenging me, but i wasn't done, not yet. "It's your fault all this shit is happening! You know that! It's your fault Charlie is dead and a long list of other people! You showed up in my life, totally fucking it up when it was perfect and then when i died you decided it was okay for you to go bat shit crazy just because our piece of shit brother said it was okay! He says jump, your already in the air asking how much higher. He says flip your humanity and it's already off! If you can't be any good alive you should've just stayed dead! You were in hell for five years and if you still haven't learned your lesson, you can burn in the pit for eternity for all i care, it's where you belong! Now if you weren't so goddamn selfish and hurt over the fact that it's your fault you let shit get so fucked up i wouldn't have had to wake up after being dead for four months just to clean up your mess!"

"Yes, Bella, your life was fucking rainbows and sunshine! Your piece of shit family here, your God complex Cullens, like there a prize, they ordered you around like a dog, who knows how long fuckface here was cheating on you, all the while making you look like a fucking idiot! People stomped all over you and you just bent over and took it didn't you? I accepted i was a fucking monster years ago, your the one convinced that i want to be the same pathetic bitch as you, tripping all over myself for a man who gets everyone around him killed!" i wasn't sure if she meant Sam or Dean but i didn't get a chance to ponder that as she continued, "Dont come crying to me because you can't handle the life you asked for, you called me, remember? You left that whiny message for me to come find you, afterall you stuttered so fucking much i knew you didn't have a backbone, let alone enough guts to come track down your own family without someone pushing you over the edge! Dont get mad at me because i taught you to grow the fuck up and finally step up when push came to shove!" She said, grabbing me and shoving me into the wall painfully, all of the frames on it hit the ground and i felt my gaze darken at the attack.

Everyone was staring, unsure of whether or not to try and intervene, but this was our fight, a fight we'd been itching for since i'd woken up. Not a single thing could stop the fight that was about to break out, and by the looks of it, most've them seemed to realize stepping meant death.

My entire demeanor changed, becoming cold and predatory, i didn't think about how good it felt to feel this strong, this angry, it was power. Whatever emotion was power. Mara had taught me that. "You want to see how i react when push comes to shove?" i didn't wait for an answer as i flew straight into her and both of us went flying through the wall of the house and into the backyard. It was raining, thunder and lightning rolling in the sky above us. It didn't occur to either of us, that it was probably one of us causing the storm, or both, because neither of us noticed.

We tumbled and as i stood back up and turned, she hit me hard in the jaw. I caught my balance quickly enough, and barrelled into her all over again. We flew straight through two thick trees and down a small hill. Causing both trees to collapse behind us. I flipped my body back up, running and kicked off of a tree, and hit her hard. Both of us hit the ground, and she got up before i did, and hit me hard, sending me flying backwards and into an open field. She appeared in the field and i stood straight as she collided with me and sending both of us spiralling into the ground. I elbowed her when she'd ended up behind me in the roll and then she struck out and got me right in the gut before we separated.

I stood back up, only for her to grab me by the throat and shove me against a tree. My breathing cut short as the oxygen vanished from my lungs and i stared into her empty eyes, gripping her arm tightly. I burned her arm with whatever ability i had over fire, but she looked utterly calm, even fascinated. Mara was going to kill me, and she couldn't have cared less about who i was, she just liked killing people now. Everyone was right. Mara was gone, she was a cold heartless monster.

"You were dead for four months, probably in heaven, i hear they wipe your mind when you escape there slimy little paws, why dont i send you back, if your so much better then me, you deserve paradise after all, dont you?" Her voice was so sickly sweet that it only pissed me off even more. I took a moment to think past the haze that was clouding me enough to grasp my shield and then it blew up between the both of us. It sent everything flying backwards, everything from dirt, to trees, bugs, birds and anything in between, including us.

Luckily i had managed to land on my feet, only to fall forward, gasping for air. Mara had almost killed me, my sister had almost succeeded in killing me. I stood back up, using the tree for support as i caught my breath. I heard the strangest sounds of movement behind me and then sprinted in the opposite direction. It was fast and as i finally got back into the clearing. Mara emerged across from me, having heard what i heard, she gazed at me thougthfully and nodded at me once. We were doing this together, despite how angry either of us might be. I turned, backing up until Mara was standing at my side and we both watched as a huge string of vampire entered the field. There were many more then twenty.

"Oh, fuck me," i muttered still sore from the fight we'd gotten into, and stretched painfully. Mara looked perfectly fine, despite the cuts and bruises i could see rising on her flesh. I vaguely wondered if having no humanity made you impervious to small amounts of pain.

"I think your psychic vampire has either gone retarded or senile in her old age, if she can't count to forty anymore," i laughed a little, hearing Alice growl behind us. Everyone had finally reached us, but we didn't have a single plan. Take about half assing something.

Mara regarded me for a moment, "let the pain take over Bella, you want to survive this then let it all take over. Everything you've felt since waking up, use it, it's emotion, negative emotion, but it's power nonetheless."

I eyed her for a moment, knowing exactly what giving in meant. I'd end up like her, this was my moment. I had two options, either flip and give in to what both Mara and Kade had, or choose to be me. I was weird in every family i had, from Charlie and Renee's family, to the Cullen's and the La Push pack, to Mara's and Winchester's family. I was always the weird one and i was going to stay that way. I could reach my potential without needing darkness. I could be good, even if it was only to keep my word. The promise i'd made Sam. I was going to be good and if it wasn't for anyone left alive, then it would be because i wanted to be good.

I then saw Victoria just on the other side of the tree line. I stared at her, eye darkening slightly. Victoria. She had killed Charlie. She had ended my father's life just to hurt me. She was dead. And I wasn't going to kill Victoria, but not because i hated her, or because i wanted to cause her pain and suffering. No, i was going to end her life, because she had put everyone i loved at risk, because she would keep coming after me until one of us was dead. No one was going to die for me, never again. If killing her meant protecting people i cared about, then so be it.

The most unnerving thing happened after i had realized that. I was filled with the oddest sensation of warmth and like something was falling over me in a Bella shaped blanket or something. Like a new skin.

I didn't wait to think about it, but huge wings fell from my back along with black and white smoke and snow. We didn't have time to ask questions, because the moment that happened, i just gave in to my new form, and the second i gave in, a vampire had jumped me. I gunned straight for Victoria the entire fight, and while my new form made me jerky and disoriented, i had been the one to end her life. Luckily, no one stopped me either. Edward and Sam had both tried to go after her and Mara had stopped them in seconds, she understood, even in her weird murderous dark haze, she still understood that this was _my _fight.

Sam stood face to face with me at the end of the fight, both of us covered in blood and completely sore, but we were still alive. He regarded me carefully, scared too. Unsure of whether i was still me or not. I smiled at his hesitance, gazing up at him. I intertwined our hands, wrapping my arms around him. He wrapped his arms around me, smiling when i kissed him before returning it. He set me down, eyes bright, but still a little weary. I smiled even more, he wouldn't be Sam if he didnt need the verbal confirmation. "Dont worry, i'm still me. I made you a promise after all."


	8. Yes, It's A Cruel, Cruel World

Bella POV

I looked around the battle field and found who i was searching for. Mara was talking to Dean, and she looked to be smiling genuinely. It almost made me hesiate. I shook my head, and gave Sam a look. He looked confused, and lifted a rock the size of a football.

Mara usually had her guard up, but after such a huge fight, she'd be a little exhausted. I didn't know when i would get this opportunity again. I moved up behind her as quietly and as quickly as possible.

She tensed and spun around right as i brought the rock down over her head. Her eyes widened and then she collapsed unconscious. "Bella what the hell!" Dean shouted, dropping down and turning her over on her back.

"I had to," i said quietly, watching him stare at the blood sliding down her head. "i didn't hit her hard enough to kill her."

"Why did you do that?" Sam asked running up behind me.

"We need to get her back to Bobby's, now," i turned to the Cullen's, "Carlisle do you have any morphine or anything at your house. I need to keep her sedated."

"What are you talking about Bella? Have you lost your mind! When she wakes up, she's going to kill you!" Dean shouted angrily.

I rolled my eyes, "thanks for staying the obvious einstein, hence the sedative."

I turned back to Carlisle expectantly. "Um, yes, Bella are you sure you know what your doing?"

"Can everyone stop second guessing me? It's getting on my nerves," i said annoyed, i shifted my shoulders, unaccustomed to the extra limbs. They seemed so oddly sensitive. I figured we'd need to move fast, she'd heal within the next hour or so. Dean lifted her up, looking utterly lost and angry.

"Alright, get her into the car and then pick me up at their house, if she wakes her up, shoot her," i said devoid of emotion.

He handed her off to Sam gently, and as i turned to make my way to the Cullen residence he spun me to face him. "I know what the hell you think your doing! And now," he said darkly.

When he got that look in his eyes, it only reminded me all the more of who he was. Dean wasn't just some hunter with a grudge against the world. He wasn't just some wounded kid who got the shitty end of the stick when it came to life. He was Dean Winchester, he'd spent time in hell apprenticing in torture, experiencing some of it himself. A man with nothing but a GED and a give him hell attitude, who'd managed to take on angels and demons, and still managed to come out on top.

"I know how to fix her, so if you want to help then quit arguing with me," i said in a clipped tone. I decided i probably shouldn't piss him off even more, but it didn't mean i was going to let him push me around either.

He stared at me in shock and a sort of small hope, then quietly, timidly as if i was lying or screwing with him, "really?"

"Yes, Dean, really," i said turning and walking away.

I had kept up more then okay on the run back to the Cullen's. Edward had tried to offer to carry me and i just rolled my eyes and began the run back. I dropped down to the ground from the roof of the house, and then strolled inside after Edward. He was still slightly faster then me.

He started off saying, "I'm glad we have a moment to ourselves," _i'm not_, i thought in frustration. I wasn't too sure where else i could get morphine this easily. I could always follow Mara's mindset and just take it from a hospital, but as much as that idea seemed to appeal to me, the more i began to wonder just how much i really was still myself. I didn't fell much different, in fact i felt like a weight had been lifted, but i didn't feel dark. As i'm sure Mara had when she'd gotten her real wings.

I remembered back in Alaska, when this sort of strange energy had appeared behind her and she was able to fly. They'd look like wings made of smoke or mist of something. That had been pretty amazing. But getting her real wings didn't seem worth it, especially if i got to keep my humanity and she didn't, despite not wanting it. But it didn't matter anymore, because i could give it back to her.

I couldn't believe how obvious it had all been. Mara had been pretty heart less before, but she was still human, more or less. And human's have souls. But when Mara gave into the darkness, she turned back on her soul, she let it go, abandoned it. Now, i wasn't sure where it had gone, if it was buried away, locked up somewhere deep inside of her. Or if if had left her. But i knew without a doubt that she could get it back. As sure as i knew what i felt for Sam was real. As sure as i knew the world turned and that i hated being in Edward Cheating Cullen's prescence.

"Bella, i just wanted to tell you, i still care for you deeply," he said, giving me a smile that would have won me over in seconds all those months ago. Now it just amused me. The fact that he still thought 'dazzling' me would still work was comical. "And if you wanted to come back into my life, i would let you, even after you behaved so immaturely."

I couldn't help it, i burst out laughing. "God, Edward, just stop talking before you embarass yourself even more," i said between laughs.

He was looking at me so weirdly, as if he couldn't believe what i'd said. "Dont be coy Bella, i know you miss me," i laughed even more.

"Oh yeah, can't you just see the inner turmoil within me," i said sarcastically, and then started laughing over me. Carlisle and the others entered the room and stared at us.

"The supplies at this way," Carlisle said, deciding not to comment on Edward's humiliated look and my amused one.

He walked past us and into his study, i patted Edward on the chest, grinning from ear to ear, "your funny Edward, pathetic, but funny."

The house was the same as it had last one, to every boring ostentatious detail. Hell, the paint probably cost more then my car did. "How much do you need?" Carlisle asked hesitantly, he clearly didn't want to give it to me, but if i had to i would force it out of him. I didn't need the authorities looking for me all over again. God, that had really sucked.

"Everything you have, she'll burn through it all like it's water," i said shaking my head. I just needed her out for a short while. Once i made a more concrete plan then the half baked one i had now everything should work out. I just needed time, and Mara would catch onto what i was doing to quickly. She just knew me too well.

Kade would be a problem too. As soon as he realized our sister was MIA he'd be pissed, and he'd know exactly what happened too. But i wasn't too worried, anger made people messy in fights, and i got the feeling we were well matched as long as i had the Winchesters. I couldn't kill Kade and i didn't want to, but i knew he wouldn't feel the same way. With Mara out of the picture, the playing field was evened out a little better. I couldn't take on both of them. They come at me guns blazing if they knew what i was up to.

"Just be careful, i'd hate for you to accidently harm your sister, even if you two aren't agreeing on everything, drugging her isn't going to help," he said giving me a weary look.

I narrowed my eyes, i didn't like the way he was talking. He didn't deserve to speak to me as a father would. He was just as bad as Edward was, for not telling me, for not warning me and preparing me for that deceit.

After they'd all betrayed me, i'd snapped. I'd given in to some of my darker thoughts, some of my darker less worthy cravings, and i blamed them. They made me hate myself, for being so naive and blind to the truth. They made me feel worthless and resentful of all things family related.

Didn't they realize how crappy things were within my own family? Yes, i loved my family, very much so, but that didn't make me happy with the way things were. But they were supposed to be family, a second family as important as the first, if not more. But no, they had betrayed me and hurt me far worse then Charlie and Renee had all together. I hated them with every fiber of my being.

Renee had never gotten the life she wanted. Pregnant too young, i was an unplanned child. I knew she loved me, but that didn't make my own resentment for her lessen. Renee had been a child as much as i had been. I grew up having to mommy her instead of the other way around. I had to grow up too fast, especially with the way she lived. She used to go out constantly, always having new boyfriends and some of them had been me. But even when i complained she turned a blind eye to me, saying i was angry because i thought she was replacing my father, but that wasn't it. She taught me nothing, and i learned about everything in life the hard way.

When i had been little, i absolutely hated father's day. People would ask me what i had planned for father's day, and i wouldn't say anything, because i knew even phoning my father meant the answering machine. When people asked me what he was like, i wouldn't know what to tell them. We were strangers, and we still were. I had meant to mend that bridge when i'd moved in, and we'd started to, but now we'd never know each other. We'd never get to have a real father-daughter relationship. And that broke my heart.

Now i hated it because he was dead, and it was my fault, because i had been so blind with my own adventure that i had forgotten how messed up i'd left everything back home. I think for the most part, i meant to return eventually, whether i had planned to remain with my human family permanently or temporarily i wasnt sure. But i'd always wanted to visit, even just to say good bye. I knew deep down, that if i choose the supernatural world, it meant choosing to walk away from my human life, my human friends and family, my human job. I just never thought i'd need to decide so quickly, i never thought, i'd have nothing but pain to return to, that someone would make the decision for me and take away people i loved. Yes, the world was cruel that way.

I returned back downstairs as the impala pulled up. "Oh no, leaving so soon, what a shame," Tanya said snidely.

I turned to the living room, raising a single eye brow in an unimpressed manner. "i'm sorry is there a lesser being talking to me."

"Who you calling lesser you psycho bitch," she spat.

I rushed her so quickly no one had the chance to react, slamming her so hard against the wall it caved in slighty. "You want to see a psycho bitch, i've one hell of a day, and i'd love show you one."

"Like you could fight me," she said dismissively.

I snapped my fist forward, using a shield and she went staight through the wall and into the back yard. I stepped through it, in time to see Dean come running around the corner. Tanya rushed me, appearing like a bat out of hell and went to hit me. I side stepped and hit her hard across the face.

"Bella wait!" Dean said, moving towards me as i went to hit her again.

"What?" i snapped, angrily.

"She's waking up, if you got the drugs, knows a good time," he said a guilty look. Wow, he really didn't like how i was doing this. He felt bad about forcing her into this, or maybe about making her so vulnerable, god knows how much she hates that. I felt kind of bad too, but it'd be impossible to do this any other way without yet another person i cared about dying. I wasn't going to take that risk.

Sure we came back a lot somehow, but you never know when God might really decide to pull the plug and keep you six feet under. You just never know when your luck with run out. One of these days i might die and not wake up, hopefully if that does happen, it wouldn't be any time soon though.

"Alright, let's go then," i cast a glance back at Tanya, who was being helped up by Alice, and i smirked. Oh yeah, that felt good. So did wiping off that smug look on Edward's face when i shot him down.


	9. Knowledge Is The Souls Skeleton Key

Bella POV

It had taken us half the time to get back to Bobby's, and we dosed her every twelve hours with as much as could without sending her into a coma. Which didn't seem like such a bad idea. When i suggested it absently, i thought Dean might shoot me then and there.

We got her strapped in the basement and i felt a twinge of guilt about the position i'd forced her into. Kade had been calling her too. She had a password on her phone, and seeing as this was Mara we were talking about it could've been anywhere from the most obvious to the least. Which was just about everything. I couldnt even answer when he called, but i think that was her intent. He would come looking for her soon.

"So what are we doing here exactly?" Bobby asked, as we all stood outside of the panic room door.

"I figured out what's wrong with her, it's quite obvious really. She's soulless," everyone just stared at me.

"What do you mean soulless? Cas, is that something you can find out?" Dean asked turning to the perplexed celestial being we'd called down.

"Yes, i believe i can," he entered the room, rolling up his sleeve. He turned to us, "the procedure is rather painful."

We all shared looks and i watched as he slowly put his arm through her chest. She tensed, breath quickening and it looked like weird bright orange glowing veins were coming out of them both, Castiel's arm and her chest.

He pulled back, and the fiery veins receeded with him. He turned to us, "Bella is correct, her soul is gone."

We all absorbed this for a moment, "well where is it then? How do we get it back?" Dean asked, a sort of hopeful determined look in his eyes. Honestly, i couldn't have asked for a better group of people to help me with this.

They weren't much from an outside stand point; Bobby was a bitter alcoholic full of self hate after what happened with his wife. Sam was a demon blood addict with a self righteous hateful side to boot. Dean was becoming sadistic and kind of hollow after everything that's happened recently, turning him into a robot. And Castiel? Yeah, the boy was so lost and hopelessly devoted to heaven that when he fell he was as broken as the rest of us.

But that was just it.

From the inside? We were powerful, look at all the crap we've each gone through. We may be weak, but when we had one another to rely on we could go to hell and back and some of us have. Everything had made us stronger. We'd been through it all and were still going, barely, but we were.

Bobby was probably the leading expert in the United States on the occult. Dean has been to hell and whether he likes it or not, he's well trained in torture and interrogation. These two have faught in wars and hunted things i've never even dreamed of. Sam can kill freaking demons with his mind, i've seen him do it, that shits scary. Both of the Winchesters are two of the best hunters in the world, who knows maybe they _are _the best hunters alive. Castiels devotion made him resilient and unwilling to give up, and having weird angel powers probably would have made him the strongest of us all of us if he hadn't been cut off from heaven, but he was still powerful nevertheless.

So yeah, if anyone could find Mara's soul, it was us.

"I wouldn't know where to start," Castiel said frowning. "A soul is usually in one of two places if not in the body, heaven or hell. Mara has not died, as far as we know anyways. For her soul to be missing, the list of beings capable of doing that is short."

"Well let's start there, who can pull it off?" Bobby asked, arms crossed.

"The Four Horsemen, God, during a Tribunal in Heaven, the Archangels have the power to remove a soul, but i would've been made aware of this, with or without being told. Every angel would feel that. Aside from that, i dont know," he said gravelly.

"So what, we nab a horsemen, interrogate him?" Sam asked, glancing at his brother for an opinion.

"Too dangerous, let's summon a reaper," Dean said, grinning, "i know just who to ask."

I dosed her up again while the Winchesters set up the spell, and Castiel warned me about how dangerous drugging her was getting. "What do you want me to do Cas? She'll get out, and she'll be pissed."

"Bella the amount of morphine you are injecting her with would be fatal to a human being. Every time you stick that needle in her you risk sending her into a coma," he said darkly, "what your doing is defeating the purpose of saving her life. You need to stop or this whole plan will become pointless."

"What do you propose i do Cas? Wake her up and ask her nicely to stay locked up so we can hunt down a soul she doesn't want?" i asked in disbelief. She didn't leave me a whole lot of options here.

Castiel regarded me carefully, "can you be sure she truly even wants her soul back? You can return it to her, but when you do, it is up to her to revive it and bring it to life once again. How do you know she wont be angry that you did this to her?"

I opened my mouth to speak, no words coming out. I hadn't thought of that. Sure i knew she would be pissed, but what if she got her soul back and she hated me for doing it? "I dont know, but like you said, it's up to her, she should at least have the option of turning it back on, right?"

He gave me a slight nod, stepping towards me and taking the syringe from me. "Let her remain here and when she has gotten it back, she will decide for herself. But you will have to learn to live with the decision she makes."

I stared at him, taken aback, "what are you talking about?"

He eyed me oddly, "your sister changed because you died Bella. We can all see the guilt ebbing inside of you, but it is not your fault. She made that choice of her own accord. You feel its your responsibility to restore her to her former self, while it is very noble it is also false. What has become of your sister isn't your doing. Once she gotten what she's lost, will you be able to live with with the decision she makes if she chooses to leave it inactive?"

When i said nothing, he just gave me a small smile and then left me to stand there staring at the spot he'd been in like an idiot.

Everyone was standing in the living room when i got there. An unfamiliar woman stood int he middle, an angry expression on her face. "Why have you called me here Dean?' she asked frostily.

"I need your help, Mara Petrelli, she's got no soul, i need you help find it," he said pleadingly. It was an odd look to see on his face.

Dean was not a begger, so hearing and seeing it was unnerving. But we were all desparate, even if one or two of us didn't want to admit how much Mara did matter to us, it didn't make it any less true.

Even Cas cared about her, i wasn't really sure what it was about her. She was cold and down right cruel sometimes, i hated to admit it, but the girl had a way of making you open your eyes and see things for what they really were. Even if you didn't want to. Just kind of snuck into your heart and got you. The worst part was the fact that now that she was in our hearts, she would break them if we gave her the chance to. Mara was family and you never give up on family, not matter how much they hurt you.

"The Darkling," the reaper said, reeling in surprise. "She is without a soul?"

"A Darkling?" i asked suddenly, was that what we were. It was good to finally have a name for us, but what the hell _was_ it?

"Yes, Darkling's are nephilim based demonic hybrids, unique and at first there was but a single family. A daughter born to a human vessel inhabited by an angel during the war between Michael and Lucifer. A vessel which had then been possessed by twelve legions of demons under Lucifer's order. The angel in the vessel was trapped within the woman's mind, and when the child was born, another angel found the woman trapped within Hell's greatest city.

It was a horrible war that left both great species depleted for centuries. The mother could not be saved. But the child was and when the angel realized what the little girl was born as, he hid her away, knowing his brethren would kill her. She grew up to have two sons and another daughter, both with the amazing abilities she possessed.

There were thirteen bloodlines in the twelfth century and over the years they have been prosecuted and executed as witches and demons. All of the families have been destroyed and there was but a single branched off family. Your brother found out how to trigger his own power and did the same for your sister. Knowledge was the key to unlocking your soul."

We all stood stock still, trying to wrap our heads around what we'd just learned. Who knew finding out would be this simple?

"Okay, how do we get her soul back then?" Sam asked cautiously.

"You can't, to go on this journey will require her to be a willing participant, her and her brother, and i can tell already she will not agree as i can sense her downstairs," we all groaned or swore, yeah, great, talk about a real speed bump. "There's one other thing."

"Of course there is," i said frustrated.

She looked straight at me, "you will have to be in the same condition as the other two."

"What?" Sam asked in horror. "No, no way in hell."

"Precisely, now release me," she said turning to Dean now.

"What else," i said staring at her. "What else has to happen?"

"Bella, i said no, your not going soulless, it'll end bloody with all three of your like that," Sam said furiously.

"Let's at least here everything, then make a decision," Dean said, agreeing with me. Sam glared at him.

"Their souls are held in hell because of their sins, when you release your own, it will seek out theirs. They will be held in _urbis natum impudicitiis_, the City of Born Impurities. It will be heaviy guarded, but because your all stained souls, i'm sure it will be rather easy to move in and out without detection. Then it is a simple matter of returning with, and only can you claim your own soul, it will not move an inch if you are not the owner. Once that is done, it is only a matter of returning to the living world, which an angel can do."

We all shared looks, "Castiel do you have enough power to do that?" i asked curiously.

He looked away and shook his head. "Not even the three of you."

"Then we can find someone who will help us," Dean said, "do you know anyone?"

"Perhaps Gabriel will assist us, it will take much convincing, but he has the power to do it without any detection."

The reaper looked from one face to the next, seeing our resolution. "I would advise against this. But do as you please, now release me."

Dea nodded, cutting out some of the pain on the symbol she was trapped within.

"This is a horrible plan! Your not going to stroll straight into hell, there has to be another way," Sam said that God awful rage in his eyes.

"Let's see what Mara thinks first, i get the feeling she'll agree, if not for herself then to keep me safe. They still need me alive, or at least, partly they do," i said thoughtfully.

Sam just glared even more and stormed out of the room. Dean and i shared looks. With or without Sam's consent, we were both willing to do this. If Sam tried to stop us, then i'm sure we'd lock him up too. We were getting good at that.


	10. Forever Is A Long Time

**Mara POV**

I woke up hot and utterly nauseous. I frowned, staring up at the turning rusted fan above me. "Bobby?" i said confused. Then i remembered. Fucking Bella! That bitch knocked me out!

I sat up quickly, way too fast, and that sent me up and scrambling for the sink of the panic room. I vomited, only stomach acid coming up, burning me from the inside out.

"Good your awake," Dean's familiar, guarded and hard voice said behind me. i wanted to flip him off, sadly, i couldn't pull my head from the sink. I waited, till my stomach was empty of all the harsher acids.

"Bite me," i said harshly. I took a deep breath, before standing to meet Dean's hard glare. "What the hell do you idiots think your doing?"

He eyed me for a moment, "So your a Darkling i hear."

I stilled, becoming passive and then just threw up my own guarded expression. "So what?"

He smirked, "you know i'v never met a soulless person before, how does it feel?"

I gave him a cheshire smile now, "you have no idea how empowering it is."

He frowned, unsure of how to respond and he stood up straight now. "Your soul is in The City of Impurities?"

I smirked a little, "where else would it be? It surely wouldn't be in heaven."

Inside i was kind of panicking a little. They knew, i wondered briefly how they'd figured me out. But to be fair, there was a decent amount of creatures that knew what we were. Most of them knew better then to open their mouths. But the ones that are untouchable to us wouldn't care about who they told. I'm sure we could hurt or kill just about everything, but that would mean hunting them down or something, and i had better things to do.

"Your going to help us get it back, you and your brother," he said in that matter-of-fact tone.

"Am i?" i retorted, quirking an eyebrow at him.

"Yep, see we know how to put you down for good. We dont even need to be in the same room as you. We already have everything we need, now it's just a matter of going and getting it," he wore a huge grin now, like he'd won some kind of game.

"Your bluffing," i said rolling my eyes, that seemed hard to believe. I would've guessed hex bags, because Kade didn't mention anything about a spell to kill us forever. He'd told me everything he knew, even showed me all of us his research. And _holy shit_, there had been a lot of research.

"Maybe i am, but are you really going to take that chance?" he gave me a shit eating grin and i narrowed my eyes slightly. It was a good con. But until i could get a hold of Kade, or at least you know, get some kind of protection going, i had to play along. Great. Just _great_.

"I hate you sometimes, you know that?" i said coldly and brushing past him. He chuckled humorlessly and he followed behind as i ascended the stairs.

We entered the living room and everyone stared at me in an edgy alert way. I turned to Bella now, seeing the raw fear in her eyes, "i'm going to kill everyone in this room Bella and there will be no one to blame but yourself."

I turned and went into the kitchen, getting a cup of coffee. I thought about jacking a bottle of liquor but figured i should probably eat before i dipped into Hunter's Helper. I went upstairs to my usual room, and took a shower. At least they weren't following me around like guard dogs.

This was ridiculous, is there really a war for them to kill me? What could they need for that? A picture, some blood, hair maybe, whatever in case i was too far and they needed a power boost. Probably some kind of latin incantation. Then something occurred to me.

Neither Kade nor i have realized this. Sam can kill demons with his mind. Were part demon, is that what he meant? Sam can tear up souls, i mean, literally destroy them entirely. No heaven, no hell, no nothing. You just become nothing. Is that what Dean meant? _We know how to put you down for good_. His words were like an endless mantra in my mind. I didn't like the sounds of becoming nothing. Neither would Kade, man way to get screwed over.

But then again, i could always just kill Sam. I wanted to kill everyone anyways. Maybe i should let Kade do that, he's better and much more efficient when killing people. Take him killing me for example, his uncaring and void of emotion stare is where i'd gone my calculated and coldy amused one from.

I shook my head annoyed and then plopped down on the bed to stare up at the ceiling. My cellphone rang and i rolled onto my stomach. Someone had tried to use it, by the looks of it. It had been in my bag when we had left Bella's house, and now that i was here, everything was still in the bag. Aside from my phone. I answered it.

"Finally," Kade hissed angrily.

"Blow me, we have a problem," i said sighing heavily. "They know how to kill us, forever kind of kill us."

"What?" he asked reeling in surprise. "How?"

"Good question, i'm sure there are a few ways, but they also know were Darklings so once they research that enough i'm sure there's a way to put us down like dogs," i said nonchalantly.

"Jesus Christ," he said in disgust.

"Hardly," i said chuckling amused. "Either way, their black mailing us."

"into doing what, being good little monsters?" he asked in disbelief. "i told you not to go there, but would you listen? No and now look at what happened."

"Shut up, they would've figured it out eventually, that what Hunter's are good at, being nosy douche bags. There worse then rural suburban house wives," he laughed.

"Think we would've turned out like that if we'd been normal?" he asked thoughtfully.

I paused, "well then the tables would be turned. We'd be sitting around bored out of our minds because our pathetic lives and asking about what life would be like if we were supernatural creatures."

"Sounds about right," he said and i could just see the grin on his face. "So what do they want from us then?"

"To go get our souls, there plan is slightly flawed, but i'm assuming they expect us to plan everything out perfectly or some crap."

He sighed heavily, "that sounds like a lot of work."

"You know, i think they have a word for that in Hell. It's this little sin called Sloth," i said rolling my eyes at his laziness.

"Would you look at that, a city in hell just for me," he said sarcastically.

"You think if we died again we'd be put on the racks again?"

Silence met me for a long quiet minute, "i'd imagine."

"Ever wonder if redemption is possible for us?" i asked next, personally? I did not think that. Far from it in fact.

"Does it matter, i'm pretty sure all the crap we've done kind of spells out hell for eternity. Something just can't be forgiven," he said easily, as if we were talking about the latest horror movie or something.

I glanced up at the peeling ceiling, the cracks in the walls, barely noticeable. "Forever is a long time Brother."

**Bella POV**

As Mara left the room, a paranoid tidal wave swept through the room. "Think she'll want to kill us all when this is over?" Sam asked me quietly.

I tilted my head thoughtfully, "yeah, she doesn't take betrayal very well."

"Or blackmail," Dean added just as bothered with her cold voice of absolution. I began to wonder whether or not she could really pull the trigger when it comes to Dean. Surely she wouldn't really do it, i mean, they were well on their way to being in love before i'd died.

Sam and i left the house, climbing up onto the roof and sitting down. He tugged me into his arms, encasing me in his warm form. I must've looked miniature next to him. He kissed my hair lightly, and then my cheek. I smiled, leaning back into his embrace.

"Are you scared of your sister?" he asked quietly, as we watched the sky light with fire under the sunset.

I sighed at the feeling of contentedness in his arms. All i could see was the sky. The darkness closing in, you could even see the stars. This had always been my favourite time of day. This beautiful sight, especially when it was warm out. Leaving the sky something so flawless and perfect that it almost seemed to be born of a dream.

"Aren't you?" i retorted quietly. It seemed like if i spoke too loud, this feeling, the sight before us, and everything else would evaporate. Sometimes i wondered if this was all just some crazy wild dream and i would wake up back in Forks or something. But to be honest, the only upside of this would be that Charlie wouldn't be dead.

"No, i've died before, many times too. Your kind of always just ready for it after the third or fourth time," he said placing a small kiss on my shoulder. It sent goose bumps through me. "If i'm going to be scared of anything, it's losing you."

"Really now?" i retorted slightly amused, but his words rang true.

"Of course, i can't imagine not having you close to me," he said a little hesitantly, but his tone was strong and sure. "I love you Bella. Truly, and i always will. So yes, the only thing i'm afraid of, is losing you."

The intensity of his admission sent a warm feeling flooding through my body, causing my heart to stutter and trip. And for once, instead of having the words just on the tip of my tongue, they fell from my lips as if i had said it to him a million times over. This couldn't have been a more perfect moment.

"I love you too Sam."


End file.
